Communion

Yesterday was the third Sunday in a row that we took communion (I think). The first one we had everyone come forward and take a piece of bread and a small cup and return to their seat to eat and drink on their own. The Sunday after that was the first time we did it intinction-style, and we used pita bread cut up into small pieces and they dipped it in the cup and then sat down (but the problem was that when you cut pita bread, it separates). Yesterday we once again did it by intinction, but I got some "wafers" to dip in the cup, instead of bread. The wafers are much easier. They come in packs of 100 (which is just right for us); they don't take up much space; and there is no preparation or cleanup. I looked all over for some candy dishes with lids, but just couldn't find any. So we just used little bowls and it worked fine.

I would like to start doing communion maybe one Sunday per month - though I don't want to get pigionholed into doing it just for the sake of doing it. And I think intinction with the wafers is perhaps the easiest, and maybe even the best. As I said last week, I like intinction because I think it best represents Christ dying for each of us personally, but calling us to one common cup (life).

New classes, job, and car

I didn't sleep very well last night - maybe a couple hours. So I spent a lot of time praying. I think I had finally drifted off just before my alarm went off at 4:45 to make sure Carrie had gotten up (and to check to see how foggy it might be), and then I slept again until 6:04 when the alarm went off again.

School starts for Isaac today - his senior year of college - and he's sick. I prayed that he might feel good enough to go to class, or at least to see the school nurse. He went to the clinic Saturday with a really sore throat and swollen glands, and the doctor gave him some antibiotics and said if he wasn't better in a few days to see the nurse at AU. He didn't sound too good yesterday afternoon still, but I guess he hadn't been taking medicine for 24 hours yet. So hopefully today he will begin to feel better. I guess if he does have to miss a few classes it's better to do it your senior year of college than your freshman year. And he's an excellent student, so as long as it's nothing serious it shouldn't cause a problem.

Carrie had to go back to Elkhart today to give another round of lectures at a high school there. I think it's the same school she went to Friday, and she had a little trouble getting there and back (though the lectures went really well). I guess on her way there the main road was closed, as were the side roads off of it, and then her gps couldn't get a signal. I actually just got a text message from her, and she said I-69 to I-80/90 (which she took this morning) was much better, and she made it in plenty of time this morning. Hopefully the rest of the day will go just as well, and there will be no idiot high school boys trying to hit on her.

And... I 'think' Drew Carrie may even be getting a new car today. They looked at a 2004 Malibu with 31000 miles on it Saturday. The dealer just got it in (and doesn't even have the title yet, actually), but I think they will purchase it once they can. I got to drive it a bit, and it is one nice ride. It's nicer than any car Jane and I have ever had. It would be a relief to check that off the list.

Now I just hope I can stay awake today.

New mic batteries

I put new batteries in the Shure lapel mic this morning. According to my records (blog category) they were last changed on March 22, 2009, but it seems like I did it once since then. At any rate, it cut out a few times last week, and that always seems to be the signal.

Mowing bunnies

I mowed yesterday afternoon. North to south. Took me 2 hours 15 minutes. The grass was nice and green - as good as it's been all summer. But it was depressing. Just east of the patio, about 3 feet from the house, I was turning the corner and I saw something fly out from under the mower out of the corner of my eye. I thought it was a clump of grass. It rolled a ways. Then it started to move again. It was a little baby bunny. It took off for the cornfield. It would run a ways, then stop, then run again. It was so small it had a hard time running even through the mowed grass. The other bunny never made it out of the nest. Why would a mother bunny build a nest right there?!? I didn't even see it. Dang. I was bummed the whole rest of the day. I hate doing stuff like that.

Doctor visit

I had to go to the doctor again yesterday. Just a routine visit for my blood pressure. It was 130/88, but he said that was ok since I'm healthy otherwise. So we're staying with the same meds. Personally, I would like to see it lower than that, and I think it probably will go down some when I start running again. I have not been exercising at all.

My weight was 176, which is 5 pounds heavier than I was on May 30 (which is when I quit running). I was afraid maybe I'd gained more, and this is almost as heavy as I've ever been. I probably got a little heavier when I was in seminary, but not much. What's weird is that my waist hasn't really gotten bigger. So it must all be in my head or something. I would like to work on shrinking my head down so I could be around 155 actually. That is when I feel the best. But with the great cooks presently living in our house... I'm not getting my hopes up.

I have to go back again in three months, so my next visit will be the week before Thanksgiving, and the wedding (and I have another wedding the week before that - but it's not my daughters). I would be surprised if my blood pressure is lower at that time. However, after that week it might be. :)

Random abandom

I don't really even know what that means. But I know this is not going to be a very restful day. Because...

• Daughter Carrie officially started her new job today. She had to be in Elkhart at 7:25 this morning - which meant leaving here shortly after 5 am. It is way too dark at that time of day to be doing anything. At any rate, I hope it goes well for her. This is her first day of sharing with high school classes. She will be at this particular high school the entire day, sharing the same thing with each class period. Then back on Monday to a different school. I am positive that she will do excellent. I just wish she didn't have to go to Elkhart. She will also be doing it around the Fort Wayne area - and I will feel much better about those trips.
• Today I have another doctors appointment. I hate going to the doctor. And I have a feeling my blood pressure is going to be high, and that the doctor is going to want me to switch medicines. Which would be fine as long as it works, but I also hate switching bp meds, because it makes me feel weird until my body adjusts. Plus I am presently taking a rather inexpensive medicine, and I don't want to have to take something that's expensive.
• After my doctors appointment I will have to race from South Anthony (on the east side of town) over to Lutheran Hospital (on the west side of town) because someone from church is having surgery. It will be close, but I'm hoping to be able to pray with her before she goes into surgery. She just called yesterday and told me they moved her surgery up, and I didn't have enough time to adjust my doctors appointment. At least it's not anything life-threatening, but still it is surgery.
• I also have to go to Bluffton today to get our insurance check for Isaac's car (and remember to take the title). Apparently it is being covered under our un-insured motorist coverage instead of by the person who hit his car, so we have to pay a $500 deductible. I guess they are still investigating the accident and the fact that someone rear-ended Isaac's parked car, and then fled the scene (leaving their car too). Supposedly the guy that the car is registered to says he sold the car and that it wasn't him. He just doesn't know who he sold it to. So I doubt that they will ever find anything out. At least we will get about $1000 for the car.
• And, as things go, just as soon as we get the money, we will have to fork almost the exact amount over to the IRS. And yesterday I had "one of those conversations" with our soon-to-be-ex tax lady. Last week we received a call from her office admitting that she had made a mistake on our 2007 taxes and that they would pay the penalty for us. Yesterday she called me and told me they "couldn't" pay the penalty, but that she would just do our taxes for free next year. And she had the audacity not only to never admit to making a mistake (she says it must have been her computer software that messed up) but then she started accusing me of things! What!?! Anyway, it was just her typical way of trying to move the discussion away from the fact that she might have been wrong, and as she does every time any of us speak to her, she tried to in some way belittle me (or whoever she is talking to). I tell you, this lady is rude, inconsiderate, domineering, and, really, nothing but a b*****. So I'm in the market for a new tax person, and I'm hoping the church will hire someone else too. I don't know of anyone who likes this lady. And I don't know why we've waited this long to change. I'm getting all riled up just thinking about it again.
• Sometime today I need to clean the house and mow and take care of some weeds. However it looks like it's going to rain, so the outdoor stuff will have to wait.
• Tonight will be date night though... and if you are married and do not take a date night - you should be shot. Well, maybe not shot, but you need to take a date night. Just the two of you, find a place to eat, go do something afterwards - a movie, listen to some music, take a stroll, go shopping... whatever. We have done it every Friday for as long as I can remember (which isn't really saying much - I can't remember very long). But it's something that we've been able to maintain fairly well. The biggest problem is when there is a wedding and Friday is usually the night of the rehearsal. But we can still get away after that.
• Well, I have probably wasted enough time. I need to take a shower; maybe brush my teeth. Time to get going.

Peace out; and in.

Seminary questions

I've been asked by a seminary to share some thoughts with their long range planning committee. Surely they must be nuts for wanting my opinion, but I was honored to be asked. They would like me to answer the following 3 questions (on Sept. 16):

• What is God doing in your ministry context?
• What are the biggest challenges you face?
• What can [the seminary] do to help you and what do we need to do to help our students face similar challenges?

It would probably not be a good idea to show up and just say "I dunno." Actually, it has been helpful to me personally just thinking through the questions - though I don't really have any answers yet. I thought maybe writing them out might help. If anyone has any suggestions, please feel free to share.

The most loving place - pt. 1

I'm reading The Most Loving Place In Town by Ken Blanchard & Phil Hodges. It's different than most of the books I read. I suppose it's a work of fiction, sort of. I think they call it "a modern-day parable." But it's an easy read, and I kinda like it so far. Nothing too heavy, but definitely worthwhile.

Some statements they list on p. 35 are good:

• A few minutes of brutal honesty are worth years of self-deception.
• God's love for me is bigger than any mistake or leadership miscue I can ever make.
• Having safe-harbor accountability relationships is a vital antidote to the pressures and isolation of leadership.
• Get out and about. Learn as you listen. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you fall in love with God's people again.
  

Tiny tomatoes

We've been getting quite a few tomatoes off of the cherry tomato plant. And look how tiny some of them are. I don't think we've ever had any as tiny as the two in the front. I love these things though.

The other hanging tomato plant still just has one tomato. It is finally getting red, but it doesn't appear that it's going to grow any more. Weird.

Btw, that's my watch that doesn't keep good time. I need to replace it, but only if I can find another Timex indiglo just like this one.

Missional small communities - stetzer

Ed Stetzer talking about 'Missional Small Communities' (and links to other of Ed's talks). About 35 minutes.

http://vimeo.com/6241475

I missed some stuff the first time through, but some of the things I wrote down:

• "I'm not concerned as much with the container, but with the fact that the church has become contained."
• "Life-change happens best in small groups/communities."
• When you have less to maintain you can focus more on mission" (yo-yo)
• "Sometimes pastors and teachers love to teach more than they love to see people learn."
• "World Outreach Center"
• "We want to create learners, not dependents."
• Connect. Grow. Serve. Go.

ht

Different

This is the view behind our house. It was just the other day when I first noticed this one corn stalk rising above the rest. I don't know if it shot up all at once, or if I had just missed it before, but now I can't NOT notice it when I look out the back window. It's at least a foot taller than the rest of the corn stalks. It's kinda weird... unique... different... I like it.

I suppose - since I am a pastor and all - I should point out the obvious lesson that this is how we all can be. We don't have to 'go along with the crowd'... we can rise above and stand tall and reach for the stars and all that. Which is true. I do believe God's grace is all about empowering us to overcome our struggles and free us from those things that can hold us back.

It also reminds me of a time when I hadn't been a Christian very long. The first pastor I really ever knew was trying to be friends with me, and he seemed intent on showing me that he was no different than I was. What he didn't realize was how discouraging that was to me. Because at that time in my life the last thing I wanted was for my pastor to be just like me. I was looking for hope that I didn't have to be like me anymore; that it was possible to be different; that there actually were people who didn't cave in to temptation, and didn't settle for less, and really believed we could do all things through Christ. Not only did I want to hope pastors weren't like me, but I hoped anyone who had given their life to Christ was different. I wanted to know that Christianity was real and true.

So... I'm glad I saw this cornstalk. Because I need to be reminded of that myself from time to time now. It IS possible to be different. We don't HAVE to be done in by the same old sins time and again. We don't have to go along with the crowd. There IS hope. I know, because I have been transformed through my relationship with Jesus; by the power of the Holy Spirit working in me. Not that I am perfect... and not that I'm better than anybody else... but I am definitely different than I used to be. Thanks to God.

Random thoughts # one more

Man, I feel like somethin'... I'm just not sure what. Nothin' much to say but these few fragments.

• So, I fell asleep while praying this morning, and the tree trimmers at the neighbors woke me up. Took me awhile to figure out what the noise was.
• I hurt my knee somehow yesterday. I can't imagine it was from walking on the treadmill the other day, but I don't know what I would have done. I've had problems with my knees being sore before, but this feels more like an injury of some sort. It's on the inside and back of my right knee.
• I started two new books today. One is a loaner from Isaac: New Light From Old Stories, by Leslie J. Hoppe; and the other is The Most Loving Place In Town, by Ken Blanchard and Phil Hodges. The first one is a little heavier than the second, but both of them seem pretty good.
• Yesterday we took communion by intinction. We have done it that way before on special occasions, but I don't think we ever have on a Sunday morning. I like doing it that way. I think it best represents that Jesus gave his life for each of us as individuals, but calls us to live in community as one. All-in-all it was a pretty nice morning. It was also the first time Jane and I led us in singing 'Give Me Jesus.'
• I still can't decide what to do with the shaking-hands-after-our-worship-gatherings thing. I haven't done it for several weeks, and no one has said anything to me, but it feels really weird to me. I don't think I like it. I feel like I'm missing out on something.
• Saturday night we went to the library to hear 3 bands - one covering Grateful Dead music, one covering Bob Dylan music, and one covering The Police music. We didn't stay for the last one because it was freaking cold. Other than the weather it was a great night to be downtown though. There was a baseball game, the music outside the library, and the mardi gras-type party on Columbia Street. There were people everywhere, but, like I said, it got oddly cold for an August evening. I should have brought a coat. Anyway, it was great seeing all the hippies at the library. I wish I were a hippy.
• Someone put a purple flamingo in our yard last night. I think it has something to do with raising money for alzheimers, but I haven't read the thing hanging around its neck yet. I'm not really a good person to ask for donations.
• Jane starts a new class tonight. Of course she had to go in early for a meeting today too. I think this job she has now has more meetings than any place I have ever known of. And they're all outside of working hours. I'm glad I can meet with my boss any time and any place.
• I'm not in a particularly bad mood today, but not really a good one either. Kind of indifferent.
  

The hardest thing about being a pastor

I've been thinking about this for awhile. And I don't know that being a pastor is any different than any other job... Sure, there are aspects that make it unique, but in the end it's just what I do. Every job has it's good points and bad. But still, I was thinking about the hardest part of this job - pastoring a church; a group of people; a community. I know I probably come at it from a slightly different perspective than many who share this occupation with me, so these are particular to me. This is the way I see it...

The hardest thing about being a pastor is not the sermon. Certainly it is not easy coming up with a sermon every week; trying to be creative and interesting and relevant, and trying to show that God's Word somehow touches every life in some way - married, divorced, widowed, single, male, female, young, old, saintly and rebellious alike. But, really, all I have to do is find a Scripture, study over it, bathe it in prayer, and it often writes itself. So the sermon is far from the hardest thing about being a pastor.

The hardest thing about being a pastor is not the Sunday worship service either. Again, it probably takes more effort than many people realize, but in the end it comes down to putting together some songs and readings and the Holy Spirit takes over from there. Besides, in an hour it's over and done and everyone goes on with their life.

The hardest thing about being a pastor is not "running the church" either. Yes, it takes time and thought and prayer and patience. But I've found that it usually runs best when I stay out of the way; and there are often other people who do a much better job of taking care of details and whatnot than me anyway.

The hardest thing about being a pastor is not even the loneliness and isolation. Sure, this can be difficult at times. There are few people who understand what it's really like, and fewer still that you can talk about it with. Friends are hard to come by, and it seems a lot of people need to take out their anger at God on someone. But for me personally, I would probably not be all that different in any occupation and this would be an issue regardless. So it is not the hardest thing.

The hardest thing about being a pastor is not visiting with people either. I know it is probably more difficult for me than for many people, because I freak out so easy and get nervous when visiting with people face-to-face. But I usually settle down eventually, and most people are nice and try to put me at ease. So this is not at all the hardest thing.

To me, the hardest thing about being a pastor is... that feeling when I know there isn't anything at all that I can do to help someone. Praying for someone who's just been through a terrible tragedy and knowing I have no words or actions that will help. Seeing someone sitting in the congregation as their eyes begin to tear up and knowing that I can't touch them and let them know I care. Talking with someone who is afraid to even lift their eyes because of shame and guilt and being unable to get across that it's okay; that I understand; that there is still hope. Sensing when someone has taken a step forward but they're on the verge of two steps back because they think they're all alone. The hardest thing about being a pastor, really, is trusting God to work in people's lives without me. Trusting that He will make a way.

You would think trusting God would be the easiest thing for a pastor to do. And maybe for those who are good at this it is. But for me, I hate to see other people hurting. I hate to see people thinking they are all alone, that no one cares, that no one is there... And it's hard for me to trust God. There, I said it. It's hard. Not impossible. Just hard.

Lord, I know a lot of people who need you right now. People who are hurting and alone, and there is nothing at all that I can do for them. I am trying my best to trust you. Be God to them. Please. Now. And maybe help me trust you more too.

Water-gun rights at healthcare reform rally

Mark this down as "I wish I had thought of that." Just after I posted on facebook that we ought to have the right to carry peaches (it was a lame attempt to show the absurdity of the 'right to bear arms' lunacy), I saw this post from Rose about her experience of carrying a water-gun to a healthcare reform rally in Washington D.C. Awesome! The full story and pics can be found on her blog: http://rosemarieberger.com/2009/08/20/water-gun-rights-at-healthcare-reform-rally/

I like her reasoning for carrying the water gun...

I’m taking a comic approach to a very serious issue. This country needs health-care reform now. It must have 1) a public option, 2) it must provide accessible and affordable insurance for everyone who is uninsured or under-insured, and 3) it should contain clear ‘conscience clauses’ around the issues that are morally sensitive. We need health-care reform now.

ht

Mowing

Mowed east/west today. It's the first time in 2 weeks. There was even a little grass here and there. Only took me 2 hours for some reason. It was a nice cool day.

Treadmill again

I finally got on the treadmill again this morning for the first time since the end of May. That's the longest break I've had since we got the machine in November of 2005. I tried to start slow. I never went over 3.5 mph, and just did a steady walk for 40 minutes (2.07 miles). For some reason it seems to take longer on a treadmill than on land. At any rate, that's probably more than I should have done for the first time. I don't want to overdue it. I want to go very slow. I need to keep reminding myself that I'm trying to establish long-term life change, not just 'accomplish something.' I don't need to go a certain distance or speed... I just need to get into a regular rhythm of exercise. So, here I go.

How many

Today I kind of got caught up in this thought: What if I have caused more people to decide against God than for God?

I saw someone that looked vaguely familiar, and I wondered if they had perhaps been a part of our church at some point. Then I started thinking about all the people who have come and gone. There are literally people that I have no recollection of. Which just blows my mind. Granted, I realize that just because someone leaves our church doesn't mean they have left THE church. But it might. What if I'm hitting a negative instead of a positive? More of a drain than a benefit?

I'm not looking for encouragement here, but... what if? What if the same is true of you?

Exercise room again

We have an exercise room again. Drew Carrie moved out quite a bit of stuff yesterday; then last night we got it organized; and the treadmill and bike are set up once again. I even got the tv hooked back up, so all that's left to do is... exercise. Ugh.

The last time I ran on the treadmill was May 29, and I only did 2 miles. The last time before that was 4 miles done on May 22. So I am pretty out of shape to say the least.

The day before yesterday I did two 1-mile walks. I think I am going to have to start back slow. I tend to forget that it literally took me years to work up to the 5-mile-a-day runs that I was doing. First we walked every day, then we got an exercise bike, then the treadmill. And it was a big deal to just do a mile at first.

I'm actually surprised I didn't put on more weight since I've stopped. I've probably added 5 pounds or so (I don't really know for sure). I think the biggest thing is this is probably why my blood pressure has gone up. It has probably been a nice rest for my back and legs though.

Anyway... if you don't hear from me for awhile, somebody come and check the back wall of the exercise room. That's where the treadmill will deposit me should I fail to keep up.

Shaky on shaking hands

So... I can't decide what to do. I thought I had decided, but now I'm unsure.

I have always been the first to leave the sanctuary on Sunday mornings after our worship gatherings. That way I could get to the bottom of the stairs and shake everyone's hand as they were leaving the sanctuary and entering the main hallway where the cookie and coffee table is (which then leads to the exit). I have always enjoyed this time, because it gives me a chance to meet any visitors, as well as catch up with people, even with just a word or two.

However, several weeks ago I had a conversation with someone (one-sided as it was), and they stated in several different ways how it was "MY Sunday service," or "MY worship service," and a few other ways I can't really recall. What I heard was someone stating that they thought the church was a little too much about me. And they weren't really being critical even. But it came across that they really felt like it was MY church, and everything they did, and the reason they attended on Sundays, was because of ME. I believe this also led to them being very hurt when they thought that *I* had disrespected them. Which, in turn, has caused them to leave the church.

It has honestly been troubling me for almost 2 months now. And I've not known what to do about it. So, what I had decided was that I needed to somehow get across that this is not MY church, but it is GOD'S church. It's also not MY worship service. One thing that I thought might help is if I no longer shook everyone's hand as they left. Perhaps this does make it seem a little too much like I am the center of it all; when in actuality, it is ALL OF US who make up the church here. So I would still do my thing, but when the service was over, we would all depart in like manner. And if someone needed to speak to me, I would always be available up front. This is actually how most churches operate anymore to my knowledge. I don't remember the last time I was at a church where the pastor shook everyone's hand as they left.

However, after not doing this the past 2 Sundays I was here... it feels odd. It's like I have now lost the most valuable time I had to relate to people on Sunday mornings. So I am torn as to whether or not this is the right thing to do. Am I just being selfish - because I like to greet people before they leave? Or is there another way to make a difference and make it not seem so much like it's MY church (or my service)? I honestly don't know. I don't want it to seem like I don't care about people and I don't want to lose touch, but I also want to get across that we're all in this together. I could use some help.

Missional renaissance - pt. 6

Chapter 8 of Reggie McNeal's book Missional Renaissance deals with "Changing The Scorecard From Church-based To Kingdom-based Leadership." Another good and practical chapter, but with lots and lots to work through. Not something that can just be done with a snap.

The chapter is built around four different leadership areas he feels are key to transitioning: paradigm issues (how the leader sees the world), microskill development (competencies the leader needs), resource management (what the leader has to work with), and personal growth (the leader as a person).

PARADIGM ISSUES
On p. 159 he says...

• "Whatever you as a leader are looking at is what you are working on. And the way you are looking at it will determine your approach to engaging it."
• "If you see yourself as a church leader in a church role working with church people to get church things done, you will behave accordingly. If your paradigm of what it means to be a faithful Jesus follower primarily involves being a better church member, you will center your efforts on church stuff... By contrast, missional leaders see the world and their role in it very differently. If this is your paradigm, you believe you are on mission in the world and are partnering with God in blessing the people in your sphere of influence.... You view your life as a mission trip and order your life around that view. For you, following Jesus does not involve adding a set of activities to your life. Following Jesus is life itself."

MICROSKILL DEVELOPMENT
Some key skills missional leaders will need to work on...

• Coaching
• Storytelling
• Conflict management
• Transition leadership
• Listening skills
• Celebrating others and self ("The capacity to celebrate others' achievements is an essential part of changing the culture of an organization...")
• Missionary training
• Praying ("Jesus invites us to ask for the kingdom..." "...prayer [should be] much more dialogical and much more geared to listening than to informing God of things he already knows.")

RESOURCE MANAGEMENT

• Prayer
• Relationships
• Time
• Money
• Techonology
• Personal property

PERSONAL GROWTH
"The truth is that God is more interested in turning you into a person than into anything else! It's the hardest work he does, and it's going to take him all your life to do it." (p.168)

• Self-awareness ("Self-awareness is the single most important information that a leaders possesses. Without this, you do not know why you do what you do."); ("Emotional Intelligence - this is leaders' capacity for knowing how they come across to other people."); ("Talent - Nowhere in Scripture are we told we are going to be held accountable for talent we don't have. However, we are informed that we will be responsible for the stewardship of what we have been given.")
• Family development
• Emotional and spiritual health ("Broken relationships take a huge toll in soul strength. Practicing forgiveness and seeking reconciliation are key to ridding yourself of toxins that poison your spirit").
  
• Physical health

Lots more I could have written down. And, for anyone who might be following these - I am not necessarily breaking down all the chapters real well. I am breaking them down and highlighting things of importance to me personally. So there is a lot I'm leaving out. If you're interested, I recommend you read the book yourself. :)

Running around

While Jane was at class last night I did some running around. First I ran around in circles in the junk room. My thinking is, if I can get rid of one box every few days, eventually I might be able to get the treadmill out again. So last night I took a box full of old Guitar World magazines out. We had four years worth - from 2002 - 2006 - all in order, and I really hated to part with them... but we've gotta lighten our load some. So I took them to the guy at Guitar Exchange and asked if he would be interested in them. He was eating a Snickers bar while sitting at his desk playing a computer game. He seemed happy to have them though. While there I also looked around a bit. He's got some nice used amps. And my eye was caught by two Epiphone Les Paul's - both of them gold. I'm not sure I want a gold colored guitar, even though it would match the dress Jane got for the wedding perfectly.

After that I went to the old Family Christian Bookstore (north of the mall) to look for some stuff. I prefer this store over the other two big ones in town - especially the Jefferson Pointe store. I was looking for one of those iworship things. They didn't have what I was looking for, but I did get a cd of "Hymns for Karaoke." I am kinda hoping this might be something the church can use to sing along with. I dunno. We'll see. I wish they had cd music without the voices somewhere - other than a computer cd. And those iworship things are so stinkin expensive.

I also picked up some stickers. I try to send a birthday card to everyone in the church, and I like to have something to put in the card for little kids. Although, at the rate we're going, I won't need any much longer. Geez.

And after picking it up and putting it back several times, I finally broke down and bought ReJesus by Frost and Hirsch. I really liked their book The Shaping of Things to Come, but I refuse to read The Forgotten Ways for personal reasons. And since ReJesus is relatively short for them, I thought 'what the heck.' But the last thing I really need is another book. Arg.

Other than that I didn't sleep for crap last night. I don't know what the deal is. I haven't felt right for a few days. Nothing serious, but just kinda restless or something. I don't much care for heat and humidity. And we're still waiting on the insurance company with Isaac's car; and waiting on our tax preparer to tell us why the IRS says we now owe $900 more for 2007; and wishing Jesus would come back today. That would take care of so many things.

Peace out; and in.

Missional renaissance - pt. 5

Chapter 7 in Reggie McNeal's book Missional Renaissance deals with missional shift #3: "From Church-based To Kingdom-based Leadership." This is a very good and practical chapter - especially for those involved in the traditional church.

On pages 131-133 he talks about how he used to refer to "Apostolic" leadership, then "Apostolic-era" leadership, and finally settled on "A.D. 30 leadership" as the term of choice. I agree that I don't like "apostolic" for the connotations associated with certain traditions. I'm not really sold on "A.D. 30" either, but... whatever.

He sums up the meaning on p. 132: "What I am looking for is a way to talk about leadership that transcends traditional clergy roles but doesn't deny their importance, that can incorporate new expressions while retaining current practices, and recaptures the essence of the unchanging mission as it morphs forward into the emerging culture."

He also says on p. 132: "Some find that they can be missional only in new settings and are quite at home engaging cultures that are not culturally Christian. Other leaders are more comfortable and effective at home serving as missionaries to the church culture, challenging those in it to connect with the Spirit's agenda in the world beyond them."

And on 133: "Now as it was then, A.D. 30 leadership is not restricted to clergy roles, nor is it isolated in church. It is leadership that is deployed by God across and in every sector of society. A.D. 30 leaders perform their roles as viral agents in the place of influence already assigned to them in their life pursuits. It would be a huge mistake to assume that the following shift descriptions apply only to clergy roles. They detail a work of the Spirit that reaches across all walks of life, giving leadership to the movement."

The bulk of the chapter is on SHIFTING LEADERSHIP GEARS (moving from primarily leading an institution to giving leadership to a movement), and he highlights 6 changes that must occur for kingdom-based leadership to emerge:

1. From church job to kingdom assignment
2. From institutional representative to viral agent
3. From Director to Producer
4. From reliving the past (the historian) to rearranging the future (the journalist)
5. From train and deploy to deploy and debrief
6. From positional to personal

He ends the chapter by addressing some frequently asked questions (good stuff):

• "What is the role of the traditional church in the missional movement?"
• "How will you maintain doctrinal and biblical orthodoxy if you're all off in your own communities doing your own thing?"
• "What is the role of clergy in the missional movement?" (Answer: The clergy will be valued for the following functions: teaching, life coaching, missional strategies, training for missional community leaders).
• "How do I earn a living doing what you're talking about?"
• "What about my call?"

In the "how to earn a living" part he discusses the need to "Clarify your life purpose." This is a three- or four-sentence statement of what you want to accomplish. Something I need to do (regardless). Something I think everyone should do.

Good chapter. Honestly, this answered some of my own questions regarding clergy and our role in things missional. Made me feel much better.

Hugging difficulties

Most people who know me well know that I'm not a real "hugger." And it's not that I don't like to hug AT ALL. I mean, there are times when I will even initiate it. The thing with me is that sometimes it's just so ...awkward. And I recently wondered if it had anything to do with me being left-handed. Not only am I left-handed, but I'm 'cross-dominant' (or whatever you call it)... I do some things left-handed and some things right-handed. So maybe it's that I don't know *how* to hug. Like... do you put your head to the left or to the right of the other persons head? I think I usually go left, but maybe I'm wrong, and maybe that's why it's awkward. It seems like with some people there's always this dilemma, and it's almost like we put our faces together (which is really awkward). Plus, I don't think it helps that I'm kind of short. I hate having to stand on my toes to hug somebody tall.

So, how do you hug - left or right? Or not at all?

Isaac's car

Isaac's car got hit last night. It was parked along the street in Anderson and an unidentified driver hit it around 10 pm. They fled on foot and left their car at the scene too. Which probably means they were drunk, had no insurance, it wasn't their car, or a combination of the above. Isaac was on his way home from the Jesus Radicals conference in Memphis when it happened. Fortunately it was parked across the street from his pastor's house, and his pastor called him and let him know.

I'm no insurance man, but I think it's probably totaled. It's a '97 Lumina, it's undriveable, and the frame is probably bent. Bummer. This is actually the second Lumina we've been through. Carrie was involved in two accidents with our '92 Lumina before Isaac finally rolled it on its top in a field and totaled it. At least he wasn't in this one at the time. Anyone know where we can find a good car for real cheap?

Library saturday night

We went downtown to Rockin the Plaza at the library again last night. It was a nice night to sit outside, feel the breeze, and listen to some music. And there was a pretty good crowd too.

We didn't get there until around 8, and I think it starts at 7 pm. We parked behind Cindy's again, and at first just stood at the back of the crowd watching some band I didn't at first recognize. Finally we saw a seat open up along the metal benches along the library and we snagged that. When we got closer I could see that the singer/guitarist was Eric - whom I spent almost every Saturday afternoon with for a year or better when Isaac was taking guitar lessons. Eric wasn't Isaac's teacher, so while I was waiting on the boy, Eric and I would usually hang out and chit chat at the little music store where he worked and gave lessons. I always thought he was nice for a young guy.

It was kind of odd because I thought I heard Eric's band (Bellweather) say this was their last song a couple of times; then they finally said they were stalling because the band that was to follow them hadn't shown up yet. I think they must have played about an hour longer than they were supposed to, but they never once complained or let it show - they just kept on playing. Finally I saw an old blue van pull up out front, and sure enough Bellweather said this would actually be there last song. After they got done they also said it was their last show. So that's always sad. Anyway, they were troopers about the whole thing, and I kinda like their smooth, bluesy feel. Reminds me of Santana a little bit.

The next band was a trip. I think their name was Zephaniah or something. They pull up in their van - they had driven straight there from playing in Kansas City - and as soon as they unloaded their stuff they took the stage and stood and waited for the sound guy to give the ok. Two guitarists, bass, singer, and drummer, and every one of them looked like they were about 17, and they all had hair halfway down their backs. They were rarin' to go. Once they got the ok they immediately went into this thing where they all spun their hair around, and they tore into straight up metal! It was the first metal band I had seen at the library, and I thought perhaps there were too many burned out old hippies in usual attendance to care for it. But people actually stayed. And the band even got a crowd to gather up front of the stage. Of course this displaced the two old homeless guys that had been up on the edge of the stage for most of the night. It was odd, because it brought back so many good memories of Isaac's first band. They sounded just like them. But lemme tell ya, even though metal is not my first love in music, these guys were INTO what they were doing. It was a joy just to watch them. They strutted around, they flung their hair all over the place, they had poses, and they did little gimmick things, the one guitarist went out into the crowd quite a bit, the singer really opened up with the crowd... these kids were showmen. It is so much more fun watching someone enjoy themselves than to watch a band who looks like they would rather be somewhere else.

Anyway, we didn't stick around too long though. Jane had to write a paper, and I need to get to bed at a decent time on Saturday nights (11 pm). We hoped to be able to see the fireworks from the baseball game before we left, but they hadn't started yet.

There were a few sights last night too... A couple came through that had just gotten married (she still had on her wedding dress), and the photographer took their picture in a few places. There were quite a few people playing with those stick things - whatever they are. The balloon guy made a BUNCH of balloons for people. One of the neighboring churches set up an ice cream stand. There were two rottweilers there that I wished hadn't been there. Sorry, but I don't particularly care for rotts. And these two were mean looking. The one kept walking back and forth in front of us, and it was like he looked right through you. The other one was on the other side, and there were several people trying to keep it under control throughout the night. He was wanting to tear into somebody or something. I don't know why you would bring a dog like that to something like this. And there were other kinds of dogs there too. There was also this tall girl who walked by in a short, short dress, and her and the two guys she was with sat on the grass in front of us, and she just plopped down and went cross-legged for all the world to see without a care in the world. It seems like there were a few other noteworthy items, but I can't remember them now. It's always interesting... if you like to people-watch and just hang out. Which I do.

Then, just about when I was ready to doze off in bed, I hear the phone ring. Isaac was on his way home from Memphis and someone called him and told him that someone had run into his car. He parked it out in front of a friends house, and this car ran into it, and I guess the people in the car just got out, left their doors open, and took off running. So I suppose they don't have insurance or anything. I haven't heard how bad it is or anything. Whattya gonna do? Life.

Missional renaissance - pt. 4

Chapter 6 of Reggie McNeal's book Missional Renaissance is on "Changing the Scorecard From Measuring Programs to Helping People Grow."

He says right up front (p.111): "The second shift of the missional church - helping people grow - is the most challenging... Moving in this direction, however, calls for us to get out of the church business and into the people business." I agree on both counts.

On p. 112 he contrasts how things are measured in the program-driven church vs. how he thinks it should be. In the program driven church model the activities and numbers center on...

• Number of people involved, attending, or participating
• People recruited for church services
• Church activities
• Spiritual disciplines
• Money gathered and spent on church needs
• Church turf
• Church-centered "opportunities for growth"
• Staff devoted to program management

He contrasts these with the scorecard he says should be in place to celebrate a people development culture, including but not limited to...

• Relationships that people are intentionally cultivating
• People released into service
• Personal life development
• Money spent on people rather than buildings and administration
• Life turf (home, work, school, community, and so on)
• Life-centered growth
• Staff engaged in coaching people for their personal development

He sums up nicely on p. 113: "The people development approach reflects an understanding that the church in its essence and highest expression is incarnational, not institutional."

He breaks things down according to the same resources as before: prayer, people (leaders and others), calendar (time), finances, facilities, and technology.

I like the area on 116 where he discusses four categories of growth. He says, "I find that it helps to think in terms of four categories when it comes to helping people grow in their individual lives... self awareness, skill development, resource management, and personal growth." The explanations in the book help, and they make sense to me.

At the end of the chapter he talks about how the leaders in one church had conversations with their people and asked these five questions:

• What do you enjoy doing?
• Where do you see God at work right now?
• What would you like to see God do in your life over the next six to twelve months? How can we help?
• How would you like to serve other people? How can we help?
• How can we pray for you?

I should probably re-read this chapter. There was some good stuff, but it is complicated and difficult, and people are not going to be the same everywhere, and, you know, people are strange too. He is up front about the fact that this is not all-inclusive. It's a place to start. Which is better than giving us a place to stop. This is definitely a key to it all though. imho.

Woodstock is 40 and love is real

It's kind of hard to believe that the original Woodstock Music Festival was 40 years ago August 15-18. Maybe what is even harder to believe for many is that the couple in this picture - one of the more famous photos from the weekend; and also the cover of the album - are still together as well.

I saw a nice piece about it by Brian Williams on the NBC Nightly News this past Wednesday, and there's a nice article about Nick and Bobbi Ercoline HERE.

Perhaps there still is some good news out there.

Comings and goings

Daughter Carrie is now living with us again (temporarily). She arrived sometime during the night last night and the 2 years in Findlay, OH are now officially over. A job well done, I think. Now it's time for new things. A new job in a couple of weeks, and apartment/house hunting in Fort Wayne.

Today son Isaac takes off from his home in Anderson for Memphis, TN, where he will once again be attending a Jesus Radicals conference. Hopefully all will go well (conference poster at right).

Lady Jane and I will likely be in the same place, as usual. Although you just never know what a day might hold. Eh... maybe.

peace out; and in.

Tomatoes and grilling

The tomato plants don't look so hot, but at least we're finally getting some. The ones on the left are cherry tomatoes, and we've actually had a few of those already, and you can see there are some ripe ones, and quite a few green ones as well. The beefsteaks on the right aren't quite as good. There is just one tomato - and that's all there's ever been. I'm wondering if another one will ever grow.


A few weeks ago I poked some holes in the side of the buckets, because they were getting sooooo stinking dry. We have to water them almost every day. Granted, it's been pretty dry around these parts, but I didn't expect it to be like this. I thought the holes in the sides might help with air flow. Also, we started out with no lids, but we put lids on, and just cut about a 2" hole to water through, because I thought maybe the dirt was getting too sun-baked.

I don't know if the plastic is just too hard, or if it's something else. The cherry tomatoes taste fine, and other people have said their tomatoes aren't coming up real good this year either, but the plants have just looked so wilted and sad. I dunno. It was definitely worth a try though.



And this was our supper last night cooking on the grill (corn on the cob and salmon). I did the lighting, but I let lady Jane do the cooking of such delicate foods (Plus somebody had to take pictures). We switched back to charcoal several years ago. There was probably a reason, but I can't remember what it was now. I think I've almost got the fiance trained on the grill too, so now that Carrie is living with us again he can get to know my grill as well as my girl. As you can see, I need to sweep off the little shelf too. People make fun of my whisk broom I hang off the grill, but it comes in handy sometimes.

So log les paul

It's a sad day for the music world. Les Paul has passed away at 94 of complications from pneumonia. He was known not only as the inventor of the solid-body electric guitar, but also very much paved the way for rock and roll music. In addition to the guitar, he invented multi-track recording, overdubbing, delay and various other effects which the music world takes for granted today. There is a nice article about him HERE, and also a nice wikipedia entry HERE.

The first electric guitar I ever played was a borrowed Epiphone Les Paul 'Black Beauty' (at right) when I was in high school. It was a slight upgrade from the first electric guitar Les created, called "The Log" (which he's holding in the left photo).

I was not aware that Les Paul was just his stage name. His real name was Les Polsfuss. And do you know the first person he ever gave a guitar lesson to? None other than Steve Miller (of the Steve Miller Band).

Fly like an eagle, Les. RIP.

How to fight with your spouse

A nice post at The Happiness Project on Twenty-Three Phrases To Help You Fight Right.

As the author says, "Almost all couples fight; the secret is to fight right. I’ve posted about what not to say during a fight. Here are some phrases that actually help."

Good stuff - especially if you are prone to arguing, or were just married, or are just about to get married, or have been married for too long, or are getting close to being married for too long, or... even if you're not married but you are around other people...

http://www.happiness-project.com/happiness_project/2009/08/twentythree-phrases-to-help-you-fight-right.html

Missional renaissance - pt. 3 (from program development to people development)

Chapter 5 in Reggie McNeal's book Missional Renaissance describes missional shift #2: From Program Development To People Development. He says to foster a people-development culture we need to move:

• from standardization to customization
• from scripting to shaping
• from participation to maturation
• from delivering to debriefing
• from didactic to behavioral
• from curriculum-centered to life-centered
• from growing into service to growing through service
• from compartmentalization to integration
• from age segregation to age integration

Some of my underlined notes from this section:

• p. 89 - "Are people better off for being a part of this church, or are they just tireder and poorer?"
• p. 91 - "God is not more interested in developing people inside the church than those outside it."
• p. 93 - "Loving God and loving our neighbors cannot be fulfilled at church. Being salt and light can not be experienced in a faith huddle. Engaging the kingdom of darkness requires storming it, not habitually retreating into a refuge."
• p. 97 - "People are no longer going to let the church or church leaders provide the template for their spiritual journeys. Postmoderns do not know why they should have to search for God on church time or church real estate. Nor do people automatically believe that other people know what's best for them or that one organization can meet all their spiritual needs."
• p. 100 - "In a people development culture, the key issue is maturation. Are people growing in every aspect of their life? Are they becoming more like Jesus? Are they blessing the world as the people of God?"
• p. 101 - The asthmatic illustration...
• p. 102 - "Intentional debriefing should be part of our routine gatherings, whether in worship experiences or in small group encounters. You may have to fight your physical and programmatic architecture to pull this off. People lined up in pews have to be given specific permission and instruction ("Turn around and tell someone close to you the best thing that happened to you this week"). People in classroom settings need help in moving past simple chitchat or discussion about the curriculum to specific encounters designed to help them unpack their lives. You can come up with a revolving question of the week to do this. "What was the biggest challenge you faced this week?" or "What worries you most these days?" or "What about this past week is a cause for celebration?" Life debriefing requires an environment that is very differently shaped than the one crafted to focus on the delivery of information."
• p. 102 - "After we preach a sermon, we should ask people to declare to one or two people seated around them what they will take away from the message. Or perhaps we ask them to state one or two things they will do with what they have just heard or one or two things they will do differently based on the truth that has just been shared with them. The same thing should happen in every Bible study class or small group."
• p. 103 - "When people perform a day of community service or participate in an overseas mission excursion, we should debrief them afterward. Questions should include "What did you learn? About people? About God? About yourself? Did you find prejudices or biases you have that were challenged? What part of this experience or insights from this experience can you transfer into the rest of your life? How will your life be different from this experience?"
• p. 104 - "The program-driven system favors a culture that creates church customers, not followers of Jesus. It makes people who can spout off all the right answers but live unaccountable to the truth. The missional church, by contrast, dares to move into the arena of life development by meddling with people's behaviors. After all, this is the crux of the matter when it comes to overcoming addictions, confronting dark sides, and pursuing more positive life habits. Cultures that shy away from helping people address their behaviors fail them as environments of growth."

Yeah... some good, yet difficult, stuff here.

A weekend visit home

I traveled back home this past weekend. Our old church had their 150th anniversary, and I had the privilege of being asked to share a few words. Five to seven minutes was not quite enough time though.

We arrived at my parents house Saturday afternoon. Let me just say... they HAVE air conditioning... my dad just likes to keep the thermostat set rather high. I think it was on 77 f when we got their, but the next morning it was on 79. Apparently he got cold at some point. I think it was in the mid 90's outside, and humid as it can get. I know I like it cooler than most people, but I was dying. At one point my mom even said something about it being hot, and my dad says, "Well it must just be you!" I said, "I don't think so." I turned it down some, and my mom finally turned it down some more. It finally got better by Sunday night.

Saturday evening we went to a little bar in Sheffield and had supper with some good friends who are departing for Southeast Asia this week. We are the Godparents of their teenage girls (or whatever the term is where we will have custody of them if something happens to the parents). It was weird because, when we walked in, there were four girls sitting at the bar that I had went to high school with (all of us did). They were having their 30th class reunion later and were getting primed. So we chatted with them awhile. After we ate we got up to leave and the other 3 stopped to talk to another former schoolmate at the bar. I stopped and chatted with an old man who was sitting down at the end of the bar by himself. I had worked with him some, and was friends with a couple of his kids. I introduced myself to him (he didn't recognize me) and... he started to cry. It was one of those happy/sad moments and I felt a little awkward but was so glad I said something to him. We chatted and he told me that his wife of 62 years had passed away 3 years ago. He talked about that for awhile, but then I had to go. Then I got stupid. Everyone else had left, and I said hello to the girl they had been talking to - whom all of us thought was named "Sue". I said, "Hi Sue." And she says, "Jan." And I said, "No, I'm Dan" (See, a lot of people call Jane and I "Jan and Dane" for some reason, so I thought she was calling me Jan). But she was actually trying to tell me that she was not "Sue," but rather, her sister "Jan." So I felt really stupid. Anyway, I made some small talk and got out of there. We also saw the Morris twins, in addition to Jennie, Lori, Kristen and Carol. After we left we went back to K & T's and sat on the porch along the highway in Buda and talked until midnight or 1 am - I can't remember (and we changed time zones, so I was kinda confused all weekend).

Sunday we went to the worship gathering at our old church - although when we attended there it was at a different location. I always have mixed emotions when we go here, because I really like so many of the people, but the service is so different from ours. This morning they just had one combined service instead of two (because of the anniversary celebration), and the music and stuff was good. They also had a special speaker - the president of our denominations region. He is a good speaker, but... you know. It was what it was. It was an anniversary party. After the service they had a really nice lunch. I think they had like 300 people for lunch. I ate quickly, but then I had to kinda go roam the halls, because I just can't stand being in the midst of that much commotion for too long. I sat in the sanctuary for awhile, then talked with some people in the hallway, then went into one of the other dining rooms and sat with some friends. At 2 pm they had the afternoon program. It was nice. They talked about some of the former pastors (although they just completely skipped over some of the ones they didn't like), they had some videos, and we sang some... then I spoke. I probably went over the 7-minute limit a little, but I tried to hurry. I pretty much just told about who I was, what I was doing now, what my family was doing, and how the church had impacted us - planted seeds and whatnot. I wanted to lift out a few names of people who had been especially helpful. I ended by telling them that there are a lot of people in that town that I care a lot about - people I have held in my heart over the past 13 years; many of whom I still think about and pray for daily - and I added at the last minute, "They don't need your [nice new] building; but they need your Jesus." So I encouraged them to continue reaching out, and hoped God would continue to bless them. Everyone clapped when I was done (or some anyway), and I was happy. Then they played a video from another pastor who had come from the church, and had a missionary speak, and I think that was it.

Sunday night we went out to Jane's brothers' house. We visited with he and his wife for awhile. First we sat outside and looked at the cows and watched the kittens play, then we went inside. We also drove by the 39 acres we own. The corn doesn't look so good right now, so our rent check might not be too hefty this year. Oh well. We drove home through the woods and headed back to my parents.

We got up early Monday and were supposed to have breakfast with our friends from Southeast Asia and some friends who were also home from Germany. The ones from Germany didn't show, so we just said our goodbyes and headed back to Indiana. The rain chased us for awhile, but it was an uneventful trip. It seemed to take us longer than usual, but I felt good. My back didn't hurt, and I was able to go work at the church building for awhile while Jane went to class.

Today is a new day. I have to write a sermon this week for the first time in over a month. Gulp. I'm a little nervous. Actually, I'm kind of a lot nervous.

All in all it was a pretty nice weekend. I love Buda. It's always nice to visit with old friends, and it's good to take a break from the lonely routine of normalcy.

Home again, home again, jiggity-jig.

An email

So... I received the following email in response to my previous post "I Went To A Christian Concert." I'm not sure what to think, or how to respond. And I have absolutely no idea what is meant about the astrological sign. I don't even know where that is. Here's the email:

I was trying to find out how many people attended the Mercy Me concert and saw your blog

Your language and comments were very surprising and disturbing especially after discovering that you are a pastor -- I am shocked

and to see your astrological sign on your blog site is equally if not more shocking

what about your spiritual gift -- ?

isn't that more important than that

who that knows and believes in Jesus would cast their lot on how the stars or shining on their birthday

I do not usually comment to peoples blogs - seldom read any from people that I don't know but yours leaves me speechless instead of saying what's on my mind

Eph 4: 28-31

and where did the paranoia come from??? "everyone staring at us"

please don't send reply

I don't want to get into a banter -- just take my comments as food for thought

I went to a christian concert

Lady Jane and I attended the Mercy Me concert at Parkview Field in Fort Wayne last night. It's the first "Christian" concert we had been to in quite some time. Not that we haven't been to other concerts by "Christians" or at "Christian" venues, but if you've ever been to a "Christian concert" you know what I mean. People were there with their "Christian" apparel on, and big church groups and youth groups and whatnot; people acting strange. And I'm sure it was just our imagination, but we both commented to one another that we seemed very *conspicuous* there. It was like everybody kept looking at us. I don't know if they could read our minds or what, but it was weird; and I felt bad about my attitude.

I had debated on whether to even go or not. I already had the Christian-concert bias, and I knew there might be a chance of rain, so I waited until Thursday afternoon to buy the tickets. At least they were only $11 (unlike the $75 for some other Christian artists). And, I really don't know any Mercy Me songs other than "I Can Only Imagine" and one other one that I can't remember the name of. But I've kinda always liked what I've heard about them, and I thought it might do us good to go to something like this. I just didn't really want to hear the preaching blah, and have to deal with an altar call and all that crap that used to go on at so many of these things.

Anyway, we went out to eat; and of course it started drizzling rain as we headed downtown. So I thought I would kinda drive around and try to get us a good parking spot. Geezaroo... a half hour before it was to start there were just people EVERYWHERE. Well, I finally figured out that they were only using the main entrance. But still, people were there EARLY. So, since they were only using the south entrance, we headed south of the stadium. I didn't want to park in the garage, and several of the lots were either full or blocked off, but just to the west of C2G we saw a little lot that was $3. As soon as we pulled in the guy told us it was full though. So we drove through to turn around, and as we were leaving he said, "Hey, wait a minute. I'll go move my car and you can park there." That was mighty nice of him, so we got a primo spot that was even kinda out of the rain.

I had brought a blanket for sitting on the field, but since it was raining we left that in the car. Instead we broke out the old $1 ponchos. Jane's was red and mine was orange. We were quite a pair. But at least we stayed dry. I still could not believe how many people were inside when we got there. I guess I just didn't think very many people would come to this. But we walked in, stood under the canopy for a bit, then walked down the first-base side of the concourse. There were two benches along there (beside the indoor batting/pitching cages), and someone just got up as we were getting there, so we sat down on a bench the entire time. It was great. We were just under the eave of the building, so we didn't get wet, we had a good view of the big screen, and sometimes we could even see the stage. Plus the first base restrooms and concession stand were just past us, so we got to do a lot of people-watching.

I did see quite a few people I knew. And Mark Mellenger (from channel 15) had on the same shoes as me. :) But still, this is when we finally commented to one another that it seemed like everyone kept looking at us. And I don't just mean glancing, it was like every time I looked up someone was STARING at me. I thought it might have been the ponchos, but there were plenty of other people wearing them too. So I don't know what was going on. In fact, at one point, one of the security guards stopped and sat down beside us and just said, "How are you kids doing?" We chatted for a bit, and he was nice, but I didn't see him stop and talk to anyone else. It was just a very bizarre feeling.

Anyway, the opening band was Attaboy (or something). I had heard of them. They're from Huntington University (Carrie's alma mater), although they must have a song on the radio now or something. I'm not a very good judge of such things, but they kind of reminded me of the Jonas Brothers or something - even though I wouldn't know the Jonas Brothers, or their music, if I saw/heard them. That's just what I thought of. I guess they were ok. Then they did all the hokey giving away of prizes and stupid stuff while re-setting up the stage for Mercy Me. I thought it took an awful LONG time. But Mercy Me finally came out. And it was actually better than I expected. They did talk quite a bit between songs, and they had to take an intermission, but they seemed pretty down to earth. They talked about how they made a conscious decision to keep ticket prices low, and all their cd's were only $5 and stuff. They said it would seem odd to ask you to come worship God with them, but then not be able to pay your phone bill. And I can really appreciate that. They seemed fairly real about things. I liked that. And even though the guy did a fair amount of preaching, it wasn't all hokey and contrived like so many of these things used to be. Not too much anyway. And, at one point, they shut down the music, and it was just getting dark, and from where we were you could look out over the lights of downtown Fort Wayne, and they had the audience sing "Amazing Grace" accapella... And my heart was warmed. It was one of those holy moments. There is nothing like a stadium crowd singing in rain and darkness one of the most beautiful songs of all time. It was then that I was glad I had come. Interestingly enough, while we were all singing Amazing Grace one of the hospital helicopters flew by. So I hope a few prayers went up as well.

Later on they sang the other song I had heard of... something like "Word of God, speak" or something. I like that song. And when they started singing "I Can Only Imagine" m'lady and I knew it was about over, so we got up and left before everyone else. It had been good, we didn't want to ruin it.

There was one point though where we were totally bad. When Mercy Me started, these three ladies got up just behind the seats - and right in front of us across the concourse walkway - and they started DANCING. And these were middle-aged women, who should not have been dancing; and they were jumping up and down, and running around in circles, and high-fiving each other, and raising their arms up and all this stuff. And we kinda lost it. I felt the bench start to shake and Jane had to cover her head with her poncho she was laughing so hard, and so was I. It was hilarious. But we felt bad just openly laughing at them, especially because no one else seemed to even notice. Man... it was bad though. I thought we were going to have to leave for awhile. Maybe that's another reason everyone kept looking at us, I don't know. Anyway, it was funny.

All in all it was a good night though. It quit raining partway through the show, and it was a beautiful night for an outdoor concert. And let me say again - whoever decided to put this baseball stadium downtown is a GENIUS in my book. I think this is one of the best things that's happened to Fort Waye in a long, long time. Kudos. I love it! I can't wait for more concerts at Parkview Field.

2 corinthians

These two sections in 2 Corinthians have been on my mind lately...

2 Corinthians 5:16-19 (CEV)
We are careful not to judge people by what they seem to be, though we once judged Christ in that way. Anyone who belongs to Christ is a new person. The past is forgotten, and everything is new. God has done it all! He sent Christ to make peace between himself and us, and he has given us the work of making peace between himself and others. What we mean is that God was in Christ, offering peace and forgiveness to the people of this world. And he has given us the work of sharing his message about peace.

2 Corinthians 6:2 (CEV)
In the Scriptures God says, "When the time came, I listened to you, and when you needed help, I came to save you." That time has come.

Mowing

Mowed today on a cloudy, hollow day. Still not much grass. Went north and south. Didn't keep track of time. It went rather quickly.

Sweet-- water

Yesterday I had the privilege of getting a tour at Sweetwater in Fort Wayne. Wow. This is where I want to work when I grow up. I had been to the old facility on Bass Road, but this place is awesome. (You can take a pictorial tour here).

I think I might have gotten a special tour too, because I went with a lady from our church who was invited by her nephew who works in the business office. He had been telling her she needed to come and see the place, so she finally told him she would... if she could bring her pastor along. I have great people in my church. She KNEW this would make my day (or week, or month...). And the nephew actually had the director of sales give us the tour. This would be the guy who oversees all the sales associates. He started working there when they had 30 employees, and now they have about 350! I felt a little odd in my t-shirt and shorts, since these guys both had on suits and ties, but there were plenty of other people like me throughout the "mall" (they designed it so it is like being in a mall. and it is).

When you walk in there is a huge area where the receptionists sit, and the beginning of the mall corridor. Across from the entrance is the store - which we didn't spend near enough time in. I recognized one of the guitar salesmen from another store I sometimes frequent (the tall guy who used to work at B-Sharp). Then we went around the corner to some of the business offices, and sales cubicles, and training rooms, and geez... there was just room after room after room of different things. There were several studios, a sheet music store, a concierge, a place to get your hair cut or eyebrows done, a huge open cafeteria, a video store, a big game area with video games, miniature golf, ping pong, pool table, and whatnot, a nice sized workout area, showers, the school, a couple of conference rooms and arena, and the theater. The theater was so cool. It had oodles of speakers, but they could also change the tone of the room. With the push of a button you could clap your hands and it would go from dead, to cathedral, to echo, to whatever else. It was wild. The guy said it's a great place to watch movies, because it has surround sound, but it's set up so every seat is the "center." Very cool. The place is also classified as "platinum green" or something. Their air conditioning comes from big cooling tanks out back - where ice is made during the night to cool the building during the day. They also have lighting sensors so the lights adjust to the amount of sunlight coming in the sunroofs. And basically everything else is just plain green as it gets.

I can't remember how many salesman there are, but I think the guy said each one handles 4,000 customers each. You are assigned your own personal salesman (I have had the same one for 10 years now), so when you call and the switchboard rings your person, it brings up all your information on his computer screen: who you are, where you live, what all you've bought or asked about, etc. According to the guy their customer base includes people from Aerosmith to Pink Floyd to Universal Studios. I think he said John Fogerty was there last week looking at guitars.

Anyway... this was a very cool tour. I think it only lasted a little over an hour, but we got to actually go into the warehouse too (which the normal tour doesn't). It was wild. He said they can literally have an ordered boxed and ready to ship 60 seconds from when it is made over the phone. Wild. And the guitar area was sweet. He told me that when they arrive they are left untouched for 24 hours, then they open the boxes and let them sit for so long after that, then they go through a 55-point inspection (or something), then they are photographed from a bunch of different angles, then they are ready to be for sale.

I don't know... I can't remember half of what I saw. It was like heaven though. I think I'll be going back next month with a friend who is coming out to do a show at church. I can't wait.

Blood pressure

Checked last night at jpwm: 136/81. I suppose it doesn't help that I haven't been running (since early June), but I think maybe it's time to change the kind of medicine I'm taking.

Missional renaissance - pt. 2 (prayer-scaping)

Chapter 4 of Reggie McNeal's book, Missional Renaissance, deals with 'Changing the Scorecard from an Internal to an External Focus.' He says the "scorecard categories" where we need to refocus our resources include: Prayer, People, Calendar (time), Finances, Facilities, and Technology.

Lots of stuff, but the one thing that really stuck out to me was the section on "prayer-scaping" on p. 70 (bold print is mine):

Jesus was once asked why he did what he did. His reply was, "I'm just doing what I see my Father doing." I frequently ask spiritual leaders what they are doing that they see God doing. Learning to see God, to hear him, is the real product of prayer. Its major objective is not to inform him or bend him to our purposes. The result of praying is to attenuate us to God's will and God's work going on all around us. If we ask God to show us what he sees, he will! And it will change us.

For example, each member of the staff at one church was instructed to go to a coffee shop, sit on a park bench, or stand in a mall parking lot and pray a simple prayer: "Lord, help me see what you see." They were to listen for an hour to the voice of God and then reconvene to share what they had heard. This simple outing radically changed their outlook as they realized that what was in the heart of God was much bigger than typical church concerns. They began to see broken families, homeless people, at-risk children, stressed teenagers - all people they were not engaging with their church ministry. Grippled by the heart of God, they gained an urgency to address what they saw.

The staff were so jazzed at what happened to them, they actually sent the church out on a Sunday morning to do the same exercise they had done. They then brought the congregation back later that day to discuss impressions. That church has never been the same. It has shifted from church-centric to kingdom-biased.

You know, I actually used to do things like this every now and then (by myself). I need to start doing it more again. This is one of those things that's hard to explain to people when they ask, "So what exactly does a pastor do all week?" But I really think this would be a good idea for our whole church to do too. We could have a "Pray Sunday" where we all went somewhere in the morning and asked God to help us see what he sees, and then have a gathering at night and talk about it. I don't know if it would be better to just let people decide on their own where they wanted to go, or to actually suggest some spots (so maybe we had several people at the same place)? Maybe suggest some spots and leave it open too. I dunno. I'll probably forget about it anyway. But I like this sort of thing.

Sign, sign, everywhere's a sign

I have stooped to a new low on my blog today. I feel like I have absolutely nothing worthwhile to say anymore, so here are pics of a couple signs around our house.

In the laundry room is this self-explanatory sign - this is where the aluminum cans go. It's right next to Mr. Washing Machine and Mr. Salt-holder-for-the-water-softener.

I just made this note last week, because every now and then someone will forget that I am left-handed. See, we have this towel rack in the bathroom, and I can use the same towel for days (or sometimes weeks), and it bugs me when someone else will take my towel or put their towel on top of mine. So I figure since I'm the only one that is left-handed in our household, we should remember that my towel is on the far left hook. I don't know how everyone else remembers which one is theirs, but mine should be easy. Or maybe I'm the only one that has a problem with this. Anyway, I taped this note up just to be sure.
I suppose this is really a sign that I'm maybe a little anal too. I remember the first time I heard someone refer to someone else as "anal" I laughed, because I thought they were making fun of them. Calling them an a** or something. I wasn't aware that it is also short for "anal retentive." Which has nothing to do with gas, btw; though it's not really all that much fun to be this way either.

Ok... that's about enough excitement for today. It's been real.

It was a nice day

We had a great day of worship and celebration yesterday. Other than the fact that it was Sunday, we were also celebrating that we've been at our church for 10 years. So the church allowed me to sit back and worship with them. They brought in son Isaac to lead the music/songs - and he did an awesome job; good friend Wayne preached a fantastic message from Ezekial 22:23-30 about standing in the gap (he also read this blog post of mine); and we had a really good turnout for the lunch afterward under the pavilion. Oh, and the weather was beautiful too. Here are a few pics.

Son Isaac and Levi leading us in worship. They did an awesome job, and I loved Isaac's harmonica work on "Give Me Jesus." He makes me a proud papa (and he grows a better beard than me).

Me and my good friend Wayne - who drove all the way from Lancaster, PA to preach. One of the nicest people I know. And he preached a fantastic message. I was humbled and blessed.The cake Matt & Shelley made for me. How cool is that?

The cake table.

A lot of people went to a lot of work, and I really did appreciate it (not that I don't appreciate all of them normally... but you know what I mean). It really was a good day.

10 years after

Not only were they a good band from the 60's and 70's (and did you know their name was associated with Elvis?), but yesterday I celebrated 10 years of being a pastor at my church. I started on August 1, 1999.

After getting a degree in pastoral something-or-other, I dinked around that summer of '99; got a call from several churches, but just didn't really feel right about any of them. I had this guy from Fort Wayne who kept calling me, and he finally talked me into coming and just filling their pulpit for a couple Sundays. I really hoped to return to Illinois, and had no real desire to go to a little country church at the time either, but... you know... after preaching there a couple times... I decided to give it a go. It seemed like a nice place, and nice people. I signed a 3-year contract, and honestly didn't think I would make it through that first one. But I hoped and prayed I wouldn't get fired before my kids had finished school (Isaac was starting 6th grade and Carrie 9th).

We moved into the parsonage on the hottest day of the year, and they were just installing air conditioning and it wasn't yet hooked up. We unloaded the Uhaul and headed to Fort Wayne to where we were supposed to drop it off, and the place was closed. Jane said the first cuss word I had heard her use in quite some time. :) So we drove around this city we had never been in before, aimlessly looking for anyplace that had Uhauls parked outside. We finally found a hardware store at Southgate Plaza. We were home, I guess.

I had already informed the church that I had an earring, I wore t-shirts and shorts almost all the time (in the summer anyway), and I would NEVER like Bobby Knight or IU. Yet they still hired me with a 100% congregational vote. I guess when you're desperate you'll do just about anything. They had been without a full-time pastor for almost a year.

To say it's been a wild ride would maybe be an understatement. I spoke with a friend of mine the other day - he has pastored his country church for what will be 40 years in September - and he always likes to say when asked how he has kept going all these years, "I just get up every morning, get dressed, and go to work." I have said that to myself many a time. The truth is, though, it takes a lot more than just getting dressed and going to work (and he knows it). And that's why I do think this is a milestone worth celebrating. It's not just about my ability to last this long, or that a church hasn't fired me yet. I believe this is a testament to God. My still being here shows he can do wonderful things through some very not-so-wonderful people (me); it shows he can speak grace and forgiveness into situations, and make peace, and bring restoration - many times over. I am happy to have forgotten a lot of things; and happy that my church has forgiven and forgotten a lot of things too. It takes nothing short of a few miracles from God to make something like this last this long (at least in my case).

I'm tempted to say that 10 years after being a pastor I am 10 times more depressed, 10 times more insecure, 10 times more lonely... and a lot of times I feel like that. But the truth is, I have learned much, and am still learning every day about how good God is. So whether it will be 10 more years, or 10 more minutes, it hasn't been for naught. God is surely a bit crazy, but he's pretty awesome too.

To celebrate, some people from my church decided to give me the day off today. I will still worship with them, but son Isaac came home to lead the music for us, and a good friend - and the former director of our denomination - came all the way from Eastern Pennsylvania to preach. After the worship gathering we're having a picnic in the pavillion. It should be a good day.

Of course the day started off with Jane and I having to take my dad to the emergency room at 5:30 this morning because he was having chest pains. He's ok now. It's always something.