Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Theology is like a map

I can't really think of anything to write about today. Not that I have nothing on my mind, but... And I suppose some of you are thinking - "You write too stinking much anyway." Or, "You always seem to write stuff that you haven't thought about." Ha. Yep. Probably. This is my blog, though, dangit. And I'll write what I want to. :)

Anywayyyyy... To keep myself amused, I will jot this tittle from C.S. Lewis in Mere Christianity (pp.153-155):
In a way I quite understand why some people are put off by Theology. I remember once when I had been giving a talk to the R.A.F., an old, hard-bitten officer got up and said, 'I've not use for all that stuff. But, mind you, I'm a religious man too. I know there's a God. I've felt Him: out alone in the desert at night: the tremendous mystery. And that's just why I don't believe all your neat little dogmas and formulas about Him. To anyone who's met the real thing they all seem so petty and pedantic and unreal!'

Now in a sense I quite agreed with the man. I think he had probably had a real experience with God in the desert. And when he turned from that experience to the Christian creeds, I think he really was turning from something real to something less real. In the same way, if a man has once looked at the Atlantic from the beach, and then goes and looks at a map of the Atlantic, he also will be turning from something real to something less real: turning from real waves to a bit of coloured paper. But here comes the point. The map is admittedly only coloured paper, but there are two things you have to remember about it. In the first place, it is based on what hundreds and thousands of people have found out by sailing the real Atlantic. In that way it has behind it masses of experience just as real as the one you could have from the beach; only, while yours would be a single glimpse, the map fits all those different experiences together. In the second place, if you want to go anywhere, the map is absolutely necessary. As long as you are content with walks on the beach, your own glimpses are far more fun than looking at a map. But the map is going to be more use than walks on the beach if you want to get to America.

Now, Theology is like the map. Merely learning and thinking about the Christian doctrines, if you stop there, is less real and less exciting than the sort of thing my friend got in the desert. Doctrines are not God: they are only a kind of map. But that map is based on the experience of hundreds of people who really were in touch with God - experiences compared with which any thrills or pious feelings you and I are likely to get on our own are very elementary and very confused. And secondly, if you want to get any further, you must use the map. You see, what happened to that man in the desert may have been real, and was certainly exciting, but nothing comes of it. It leads nowhere. There is nothing to do about it. In fact, that is just why a vague religion - all about feeling God in nature, and so on - is so attractive. It is all thrills and no work: like watching the waves from the beach. But you will not get to Newfoundland by studying the Atlantic that way, and you will not get eternal life by simply feeling the presence of God in flowers or music. Neither will you get anywhere by looking at maps without going to sea. Nor will you be very safe if you go to sea without a map.

It's hard to know where to stop. Stop.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Happenings (random)

Had a nice end to a nice week. Now it's back to reality. And I actually need to write a sermon again this week!

Last week I had a really good time hanging with daughter Carrie at her apartment and workplace. Also had lots of good chats and discussions. Some things worth noting: Jim Wilder is one smart cookie; I want a band again (and I would like to stop leading worship/music - or ONLY lead it); I gain more respect for the president of our seminary every time I am around him. You know how some people refer to seminaries as cemeteries? Well, that's not how it is with WTS. As soon as I saw Dave (the pres.), he wants to know if I've read The Shack, because he thinks it is GREAT, and then he's asking everyone in the circle who they are working with to get them trained for church leadership (and he wanted names). That is one dude committed to what he does. Of course this was all after a big hug and the how-are-ya's and whatnot.

Yesterday morning the lovely lady and I headed south and attended worship with son Isaac at his church The Mercy House. It was our first time to have this opportunity. Nice website if you care to click the link, and a really cool missional church. It was a nice time, and even though the preacher preached an hour, it didn't seem like it at all. I loved being there and felt totally at home - even though we were very likely the oldest people in the building.

In my absence yesterday I had our church watch the dvd of Tony Campolo giving his sermon "It's Friday But Sunday's Coming." It sounded like people liked it.

Last night we had Doug and Anna Molgaard speak at our church. They are missionaries in Sweden, in the midst of forming a missional community there. Doug is from the states but has lived in Sweden for about 15 years, and his lovely wife has a beautiful home-grown Swedish accent. After Doug spoke, showed us some pics, and went off on a mild sermon rant (which was ok by me)... the better-than-I-expected crowd convened to the basement for a meal. We had the privilege of picking their brains further at our favorite spot afterwards - though we were unable to fully introduce them to our friends because for some reason there were actually other people there for a change. Anyway, it was nice to spend an evening with a couple that thinks very much like us. Too bad we live so far apart. Might have to make a trip to Sweden sometime.

Oh, and my Regional Director was in attendance last night. I hadn't talked to him in eons, but he took a boatload of pictures, so I have this funny feeling I may end up in a newsletter or something. I would really rather not, but... whatever.

Anyway, it was a good week; a good day and night yesterday. Though yesterday afternoon when we came home from Isaac's there was a dead cat in the road in front of our house. I got out the shovel and removed it - because the highway dept. apparently doesn't do things like that around here - and it was gross. I don't like doing stuff like that. Now, after being gone two Sundays in a row, and only preaching once in the last five weeks, it is back to business. At least I guess it is. My contract as pastor of this church runs out this week, and I have yet to see a new offer, though I hear one is coming. This is one of those things I haven't been able to talk about lately. Uh... yep.

Peace out, folks; and in.

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Impact: missional/emerging breakouts

I attended all four breakout sessions with Brian and Bill entitled "The Missional Church in the Emerging American Culture."

We discussed Reggie McNeal's Six Tough Questions for the Church (from The Present Future).

1. How do we deconvert from Churchianity to Christianity? (New reality number one: The collapse of the church culture).

2. How do we transform our community? (New reality number two: the shift from church growth to kingdom growth).

3. How do we turn members into missionariers? (New reality number three: a new reformation: Releasing God's people).

4. How do we develop followers of Jesus? (New reality number four: the return to spiritual formation).

5. How do we prepare for the future? (New reality number five: the shift from planning to preparation).

6. How do we develop leaders for the christian movement? (New reality number six: the rise of apostolic leadership).

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At one point in the discussion Brian shared what "Following Jesus" means in his church:
1. Loving God (reading the Bible, prayer, worship, etc)
2. Loving people
3. Serving locally
4. Serving globally

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We spent most of Friday's discussions on the five-fold leadership model - and stuff from Alan Hirsch's "The Forgotten Ways." The APEST: Apostles, Prophets, Evangelists, Shepherds, and Teachers.

It was all pretty good discussion. I gained a little better handle on the APEST stuff. I absolutely agree with it, I just still have some questions and don't understand all of how it should be flushed out in our present settings, or how to move from "here" to "there." It certainly explains a lot of the frustration I have always had as an apostle/prophet type of "pastor." We need to somehow quit thinking that our pastors need to become better leaders (expecting a shepherd to be everything, or that APE's should be shepherds), and develop better leadership as a whole (five-fold).

I don't know who coined the term "unleashing", but I prefer "blessing" or "empowering." I think for too long the APE's have been unleashed in the sense of "just get out of here." We need to somehow embrace these people more; better utilize the way God has equipped us.

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Definitely time well spent. I maybe learned more from informal conversations and discussions than I did from any of the "main event"-type stuff. But the corporate worship was incredible too. Lots to think about.

Impact: what is worship

Friday morning (after an awesome time of worship led by the Urban Light folks) the main speaker was Craig Smith. He talked about worship, and said the New Testament word for worship in the Greek means "to kiss towards."

During Bible times people in Greek culture were very status-conscious. If you were walking down the street and you met someone of the same social status as you, you might kiss them on the cheek (or somewhere on the face). If you met someone who was a little higher status than you, you would kiss their hand. If you met someone a little higher still - pretty high, but not the highest - you would bend down and kiss their feet. But if you met a person of highest status - like a king - you would drop down right where you were, bow down and blow kisses off of your own hand. This is what it means to "kiss towards" God... to worship God.

In worship we are acknowledging God as King. We are recognizing who we are in relation to Him, and who He is in relation to us. And not only that... but if you bow down in front of someone, you are putting yourself at their disposal. If the king wanted to lop your head off, he could. You are making yourself vulnerable. It is a position of surrender.

Worship = recognizing, acknowledging, surrendering. Blowing kisses to God.

He said it so much better, and the whole message fit together really well. One of the better sermons I had heard in a while.

Friday, July 25, 2008

Isaac interviews Ben Sollee

Son Isaac has his first interview for Stereo Subversion up HERE (to go along with his many movie reviews). He got to interview cellist Ben Sollee. It happened to come right after the flap over Kanye West at Bonnaroo. I think he was one of the first interviews after that. Very cool. Isaac said Ben was incredibly nice, and nice to interview. He did it while on lunch from mowing. Good job, Bud.

Church as a natural result

I got this quote from The Tangible Kingdom from Grace. This is the next book I want to read.

Church gatherings were never the intended goal; they were the natural result of people finding others who were living their alternative Kingdom story. The goal of our missional life is not to grow churches. The goal of church is to grow missionaries. The goal of the gospel is not to get people to church. The result of the gospel is that people will find each other and gather because of the deep meaning of a common experience.

This is why we encourage church planters not to start the church by launching a church service. Instead, we advocate that they launch people and add the gatherings as needed. When people are bent on mission first, the gathering takes on different purposes. We have found that when the primary values are outward mission and incarnational life, the gathering becomes more about connecting people, corporate storytelling, vision casting, and celebration.

Impact: day 2

So, last night Lancelot Link asked if I'd found my pulse. Um... I think I hear something.

I am sitting in the balcony in the dark by myself again. They're giving out awards for Bible Quizzing. But yesterday was actually a quite good day. I had several really nice conversations. Carrie, Jim, George, Brian, Bill, Andrew, Doug, Ben, Lance, and several more. I was percolating with all this, and last night Brian gave me a little booklet written by a mutual friend of ours called Creating Kingdom Outposts. Wow. I just glanced it over when he gave it to me. Then I listened to a band; talked to Jane; and I walked around the corner again and this tall skinny guy was on stage. Just him and a guitar. Every now and then he would walk away from the microphones even; sometimes walk off the stage and sit in front of the few scattered listeners. He sang the simplest of songs - he caught my attention with a Pete Seeger story; he used the simplest of chords and notes. Levi Landis rocked me. Anyway, I went to Carrie's and crashed at 11:30; got up this morning and read Fran's booklet. Wow. Wow. I will be posting from it once I get his permission. So, to answer Lance... yes, a pulse. There are lots of unanswered questions; some things I'm still afraid to put into word form; but... yep.

The band is coming out, so I think I'll join with the others here. More later.

Peace out; and in.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Impact: day 1

Yes, I made it to Findlay, OH. I am here to attend IMPACT. According to the brochure...
IMPACT is an annual discipleship event sponsored by the Churches of God, General Conference. It's approximately sixty-four, jam-packed hours of authentic and inspiring worship, life-changing teaching, engaging breakout seminars and rich fellowship with old and new friends. It's our prayer that God will use your time at IMPACT to transform you into the person that He desires you to be so that you can pursue the life He has for you.

It is put together by a very good friend of mine, and after the first night and the next morning, I'd say he did a fantastic job.

I think I was the last person to sign-in last night before they locked the doors. I chatted with daughter Carrie and Jim (a sometimes commenter here), as well as several other friends I hadn't seen in some time. It was a good and safe trip, dear. I listened to a Greg Boyd sermon, then ZZ Top Greatest Hits, then Bob Dylan's Modern Times.

The evening program started off pretty cool. It was dark and quiet, then the sand art guy - Joe Castillo - made the coolest images; sort of telling the story of Creation set to art, music, and Scripture being cast around the room. The Urban Light band led us in worship - and it made me want to start a band again. Of course the first song was How Great Is Our God - which always chokes me up for a variety of reasons. We don't do it too much anymore since we don't have a band. The band sounded really good tonight. The featured speaker for the night was Margaret Feinberg. She was good. It made me want to buy her book The Organic God. Man, it seems everything is organic anymore.

I ranted at Brian Miller for a while (thanks for listening, Brian). Then headed to daughter Carrie's apartment. I made her turn her air conditioner on, and slept well.

This morning I tried to get online and it took me for-stinking-ever to finally do it. I had to log in through the University, and download their stuff and whatnot. So I kinda missed the main session this morning. I sat in the dark in the balcony by myself. It was nice.

Then I attended a breakout session with Brian and Bill called "The Missional Church in the Emerging American Culture - Pt. 1." It was a full room (not sure how many that was). They are using Reggie McNeal's The Present Future as a discussion starter. There was some good discussion - though I wanted to say a whole lot more than I did. But... I am trying to hold back. I was surprised there were quite a few older people in there.

Well, I wanted to work on the wedding ceremony, and then the breakout session starts again at 2. I had lunch by myself. Tuna salad sandwich, side salad, and water. I think I'll see if Carrie has any chocolate on her desk.

Peace out; and in.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

The church is not the destination

I've watched Reggie McNeal give his talk "It's AD 30 All Over Again" twice now. He is speaking to the Reformed Church in America at their One Thing conference. There is a website HERE.

Overall, he's kinda saying that the church is not the point. The kingdom is. And we need to quit looking at the kingdom through church lenses, but start looking at the church through kingdom lenses.

He also talked about our job as being to bless people. That's the covenant; that's the role we were given in Genesis 12. "Don't have an evangelism strategy - have a blessing strategy."

McNeal says that Christianity is, in fact, still the fastest growing religion in the world, with tens of thousands coming to faith every day. But it's not in the USA. China is where there are more people coming to Jesus in any 24 hour period than in any other country. But he jokes that they don't know what they're doing, because it's happening in "house churches." :)

He also said that 80% of Christians in the world are now non-white, non-western hemisphere.

One thing that I really wanted to remember was at about 23:20 into the talk. He referred to church being a connecting point rather than the destination. This is roughly what he said:
When an airport confuses itself as the destination it thinks it's winning when all the planes are on the ground close to the hub, and the concourse is throbbing with people. But every time it does that, it screws up peoples lives. They're frantic, desperate to try to get out of there. When the church thinks it is the destination it screws up the scorecard...

The airport is a connector to get you somewhere you want to go. You never wake up wanting to go to an airport; but you're glad to go THROUGH an airport to get to where you want to go...

The church is not the destination, but it is a connector... to get people where they really want to go - which is 'life'. That's what Jesus came to give us. He didn't say he came to give us 'church'... but LIFE. The destination is the kingdom, because that's where life is; that's where the king is.

Good stuff. It's not that the church is bad, or wrong, or unnecessary. It's just not the point. I really liked listening to Reggie. I had never heard anything by him. I liked his book The Present Future, and I like his speaking style too. I wish he had a blog (maybe he does, I dunno).

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Home again, home again

I am back home, after spending a few days back home. That means I am in Indiana right now, after being in Illinois. Tomorrow I will be heading to Ohio for the remainder of the week though. I will mostly be hiding out, trying to learn something and see if there is still a pulse.

It was a good time back home. There is no more beautiful scenery in all the world to me. We slept in my old room at my parents house. We saw some good friends we hadn't seen in awhile, and some good friends we had seen more recently. It's always hot at my parents house though. And the first morning I had to spread manure with a real manure spreader. You know it's a small town when you can drive a manure spreader down the streets. And when we left yesterday the power had went out during a storm during the middle of the night, and it didn't come back on until afternoon. We thought we were going to be stuck there, as we didn't have much gas in the tank, but we finally found out there was a station open 20 miles away.

We ate supper one night at a bar in Tiskilwa, which is a small village that has like 3 or 4 churches on one side of main street, and 3 or 4 bars on the other side (and that's about it). We also had a meal with several of Jane's brothers and some of their kids and grandkids in Kewanee - which is one of the towns we were seriously considering planting a church in about 9 years ago. We visited Jane's brother's cabin he built in the woods. I golfed for the first time in several years. The boyfriend (Drew) beat me (he had a 44), but I was happy with a 51 for nine holes. I always shoot my best on my first time, and get worse after that.

It was a rough trip for Bogie boy. He hadn't made the 5 1/2 hour trip for probably a year or more, and the arthritis in his back legs is much worse than it used to be. He could hardly walk the whole time we were there, and kept falling down. I had to carry him up and down the stairs every night and morning. He seems happy to be back in his usual surroundings.

I have to say, I didn't really like posting stuff ahead of schedule like I did last week. It seemed kind of fake or something. I dunno. I will have the computer next week, but I don't know if I'll post much or not. Not really in the mood at the moment (though I am writing this, I guess). Sometimes it takes my heart longer to return than the rest of me. It will be good to have another off week where I'm 'outta the office.' Lots to do today and tomorrow before I leave though.

Peace.

Baby dedication

Here is a pic of me holding a baby. See, I can do it. In our tribe we don't baptize infants - we believe that's something you should decide for yourself whether you want to do or not. Instead we have a service of Presentation of Children for the Lord's Blessing. That's what we were doing here. I think it's kinda neat.

Monday, July 21, 2008

Come september

I've had this post stashed as a draft for awhile. Son Isaac has this long, long, long post HERE that is a speech from Arundhati Roy of India entitled "Come September." I had to print it out on paper to read it, and it is 11 1/2 pages, but it is some pretty powerful stuff. I know that some who read here will not like what it has to say, but... it is what it is. It's nothing personal.

I finally decided to post this because John McMahon sent me an email trying to convince me to vote for him for President. He said I should vote for him because he cares about the American people more than anyone else. I will be the first to admit that I am not the most politically knowledgeable person in the room, nor do I care about politics all that much. And please don't get the idea that I am un-American either, because I am not. But I am first and foremost a Christian, and that means I am pro-God, and therefore pro-people. So my concern is not someone that just cares about the American people, but someone who cares about ALL PEOPLE in general, and even all of the planet. And that's what scares me about Mr. McMahon.

Anyway, I thought this was an interesting speech. I appreciate Isaac posting it. I don't understand all this stuff like he does, but I think it's hard for people of any nationality to try to look at things from someone else's perspective. So it's not that I think someone from another country knows any more or any less than someone from America... but it doesn't mean we do either.

Here are some random quotes I thought particularly interesting:
"...'The American Way of Life' (Donald Rumsfeld's reasoning for the War on Terror) is simply not sustainable. Because it doesn't acknowledge that there is a world beyond America."
"...today the world is run by three of the most secretive institutions in the world: The International Monetary Fund, the World Bank, and the World Trade Organization, all three of which, in turn, are dominated by the U.S. Their decisions are made in secret. The people who head them are appointed behind closed doors. Nobody really knows anything about them, their politics, their beliefs, their intentions. Nobody elected them. Nobody said they could make decisions on our behalf. A world run by a handful of greedy bankers and C.E.O.'s whom nobody elected can't possibly last."

And, the closing remarks from the speaker (who is from India):
"I just want to say that, you know, I was so terrified of coming to America, because, when you read the papers and when you watch whatever you get to see on TV, which is Fox News, you know, in India, you know... this corporate media just makes out as if everybody in America is, you know, a clone of George Bush. I'm just so glad that I came because it just reaffirms my faith in humanity to see you here and to not have tomatoes thrown at me."

Peace out; and in.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

No parentheses

I first posted this awhile ago. Felt stupid about it and stashed it in the draft bin. Here is a revision.

At the beginning of the dvd that comes with Wilco's Sky Blue Sky Jeff Tweedy says:
I wanted a lot of the songs on the record to be... really kind of direct. I think that the world is so mysterious and so scary, and kind of terrifying right now. It just felt really weird to try and write puzzles and kind of disjointed and non-sequiter type imagist kinda lyrics. So I think right now is a pretty good time to just sit down and sing people some mother f-ing songs. I know that's what I want. Just somebody to sing me a song.

For some reason I like that. I'm not exactly sure why, but every time I hear it it's like... yeah.

Reminds me of the Bible where it says "let your yes be yes, and your no be no." Like... just be real.

But, I know, it's complicated by the fact that so many people have so much anger, and chips on shoulders, and axes to grind, and grudges to hold.

I was thinking about a non-parenthetical church too. What if we could have a time where we got together... sang some songs of praise to God; prayed; read Scripture - just read it, and didn't really have to have a sermon; and took communion together. Sometimes I think we try too hard. We need less of 'us'; less of the 'add-on'.

One definition of "parentheses" is: "departure from topic: a piece of speech or writing that wanders off from the main topic." How much of life - of church - has become that? We've totally gotten off track.

Non-parenthetical church: real people; real God.

Hmm. I dunno...

Friday, July 18, 2008

My hometown

I googled my old hometown and found out some interesting stuff. I didn't know we had a Wikipedia page. There is also a freaky Ghost Sightings page - I've actually heard of the places listed here. Never seen any ghosts though. I wonder if this is just one of those sites where you put in some names and places, and they generate fictional stuff. Never know. And I found this website about the high school I went to. Not sure who does it. My dad was the principal of this school for 33 of its 34 years in existence.

There ya go. Now you probably know more about Buda than I did from living there for 34 years.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

6 miles

I finally broke the six mile barrier for the first time in my life (that I know of). I did 6.48 miles in 70 minutes, burning 776 calories - which included a warm-up and warm-down. I hit 6 miles at 60:25 minutes, and started slowing in .5 mph increments every minute after 61 or 62 minutes. Top speed was 6.4 mph, and I used a .5 incline from about 20 minutes on. I always start out and end up by walking, because these old muscles of mine need all the help they can get. That is supposed to help keep my muscles from getting sore and cramping up. It seems to work. I also stretch before and after. This was only the second time in my new shoes. I loosened the laces a bit, and my feet felt great.

All I need is this thermos

I will probably not be checkin the comments here for awhile, but posts are scheduled to run while I'm gone, so feel free to chat amongst yourselves. Just be nice and try to keep it clean. :)

Yesterday I headed into town to the Three Rivers Festival and listened to Brian Lemert in the afternoon. He played a nice set for me and a few homeless folks. Lady Jane and I returned last night for Duke Tomatoe. It was a nice night for listening to the blues. We didn't stay out too late though, as she had to get up early for work today. You know, somebody has to make the pizza dough around here. I didn't know Duke was from Indiana. I also didn't know he was one of the original members of REO Speedwagon. Well how 'bout that...

I spent way too much time yesterday trying to download stuff for the trip. I finally figured out that I need to just download things one at a time or my computer gets stupid. I downloaded a Reggie McNeil video, a podcast from some of my cggc cohorts called Grass Roots Healthy Church Podcast, and six sermons from Greg Boyd from his 'The Cross and the Sword' series, which resulted in his book The Myth of A Christian Nation. So it should be some innaresting listening.

I did trim some trees yesterday too; and mowed part of the yard. Today I need to mow the rest, run, pack, and... find my thermos. Well, I don't really have a thermos... but I could take this chair.

Yep... it's like that. Peace out; and in.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

New phone

I finally got around to getting a new phone last night. I liked my old one, but the battery was bad. I never knew if it would be fully charged or dead from one minute to the next (kinda like me).

I have always liked LG phones, so I was trying to decide between the 79.99 (minus $50 rebate) or the 109.99 (minus $50 rebate). I was bummed because, as a secondary line on our account, I get no credits. So basically verizon gives me no reason to get a new phone. I should have just tried to find a new battery for my old phone (of course verizon doesn't make them anymore). Anyway, I opted for the cheaper LG5400. It doesn't have video, or a memory card, or an mp3 player, and the camera is crappy. Otherwise it's pretty nice. But now I wish I'd gotten the other one. Oh well. What do I really need a phone for anyway? I mean, if I can make calls and text, that oughta work. And I don't do a LOT of that even.

We also made a trip down to Three Rivers Fest last night. Had a tenderloin. Some guy was playing the main stage that cost $26 a ticket - and I'd never even heard of him! So we went to the dog show, and right when we walked up it was getting over.

Today I might laze around again. Maybe mow the yard. I'd like to catch a couple of the afternoon performers at Three Rivers. Who knows, I might even take a shower and shave today. Maybe.

The best post I have ever read

I think this post, Van Morrison Saved My Life, just might be the best I have ever read. Ever. For a number of reasons.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Isaac blogging from the peace conference

Son Isaac is blogging his adventures at the Baptist Peace Fellowship of North America conference in Montreal, Canada. He arrived yesterday and will be there through Saturday. Post 1 - while in the Cincy airport - is HERE; and post 2 about their arrival in Montreal is HERE. His blog mainpage is HERE (you know, in case you couldn't figure all that out). He hopes to at least have one post per day - maybe more.

He called last night and I wasn't real excited to hear that he and Caleb had hitchhiked from the Montreal airport to John Abbott College. You Canadians keep an eye out for these lower Midwesterners, 'kay. I am glad he's there though. And Caleb is one of my favorite people in the world, so I'm sure all will be fine. Still not sure what they're doing at a Baptist thing though. But their nice website says, 'The Baptist Peace Fellowship of North America gathers, equips and mobilizes Baptists to build a culture of peace rooted in justice. We labour with a wonderful array of peacemakers to change the world.' I guess he is part of that 'wonderful array.' I'll take that. :)

Peace out, folks; and in.

Off and running

Well, I guess it turns out that I am on vacation starting today. My "year" runs from August 1 through the end of July, and a couple months ago I thought I had used all my vacation for this year, but then... in looking back through my blog... I discovered that the one week I thought I had used was actually the year before. So... I had a whole other week of vacation and nothing to do. We may take a long weekend back to Illinois, but otherwise... it's a stay-at-home vacation. And I knew I was going to be off this week, but I wasn't sure exactly which days it was going to be until yesterday. Because of commitments I have next week, I decided it would be best to take off today through next Monday. Whatever that means.

So, anyway, last night I kicked off this vacation by being kicked out of the house. Jane was hosting a Pampered Chef party for our friend Rachel, and me and a buncha women with kitchen utensils just didn't seem like a whole lotta fun. So I decided it would be a good time to finally get my new running shoes.

I actually went to the Three Rivers Running Company last week while Jane was in Illinois by herself, but they were having registration for the Three Rivers Festival run the next day and the place was a madhouse. I walked in the door, freaked out, and walked right out. I had to go walk around the mall a bit to shake the claustrophobia outta my system. So I went back last night and it was better. As soon as I walked in the door a woman asked if she could help. I told her I needed shoes, and she asked if I'd been there before. I said I had but not as a customer, so she explained how they do things, and she took my shoes off, measured my feet, got me a pair of "trial" shoes, and hopped me up on the treadmill. We watched the videotape of me running, and she said I had good form, so I just needed a "neutral" shoe - which was what I actually had on.
So we sat back down and she detailed the different types of shoes, and said she would go pick me out a few other shoes to try on. I tried on several more, but the first ones I put on felt the best, so I just said I would take them. I didn't even think to ask how much they cost - though she said they were all "about the same."

You know, I have to admit - and I'm totally ashamed to be such a moron - but it was just a little distracting having this young women with mile-long perfect legs and the shortest of short shorts sitting down right in front of my face and touching my feet and whatnot. I think I would have bought a pair of snowshoes if she told me to. I know, I am a cad. And it's so unlike me to just walk in, try on a pair of shoes, and walk out with them. I NEVER buy anything without at least 2 or 3 trips to the store. Oh well, not going to dwell. I like my new shoes. They are Sauconey.

On the way home - coming down Clinton - I came upon a bunch of cop cars, ambulances, and fire trucks. I saw on the news it was because they'd found a dead body. And when I drove past Headwaters Park it was just PACKED with people for Three Rivers Festival. On a Monday night, even!

I made a couple stops for groceries, and a back brace for when I mow, and headed home. All the party-goers were gone and Jane and Rachel were cleaning up. I ate some leftovers of what they had made.

I think today I may go to the doctor and see what's up with this rash. I got some new otc medicine and it made it worse. I also need to prepare a wedding ceremony for in a couple of weeks. I think I'll leave the rash out of that.

Monday, July 14, 2008

Which is worse

So... it's Sunday morning, a couple hours before the start of our worship gathering, and I am sitting in the chair in my office praying (leaned over; head in hands; eyes closed). I heard the front door open (my office is right inside the front door, and my door was open) and it was several minutes before I finally hear someone say, "Hi Dan." I looked up, saw them standing in the doorway, said "hi ____," and he went on. I went back to praying.

What I'm trying to decide is... would it have been more rude of me to keep praying and ignore this guy, or was it more rude to interrupt my time with God to say 'hi' to this guy? I don't really know.

Baby dedication & concert

Yesterday morning we had a baby dedication during the Sunday worship gathering. It was nice of them to bring 23 guests. I was hoping it might get us over the "100" mark, but not quite (I know, all you church haters will think that's all pastors think about - get a life). The part where I hold the baby went well. I thought to turn the ceiling fans on. Babies seem to like ceiling fans. Afterward the family had a picnic under the pavilion and invited Jane and I to eat with them.

Last night we had the Ryan Hirschy concert. It was a nice day, but windy as all get-out, so I had it indoors instead of at the pavilion. The wind creates too much havoc with microphones, and at lunch we had trouble holding onto our plates. We seriously need to plant some trees for a wind break to the west of the pavilion.

It actually turned out to be a good concert. Ryan got some new gear - all Bose. It sounded great. He is also a really good singer, and Brad Byerly is an excellent accompanist on keyboard. I enjoyed just sitting back and listening with my eyes closed. Two highlights for me were when Brad played the Michael W. Smith instrumental "The Giving" off his Freedom album (I think it was the giving). Then when Ryan sang the old Keith Green song "My Eyes Are Dry"... and my eyes were not dry. A very good show. Indoors has a more formal feel to it, but the sound is much better.

I thought since we were having the show in the sanctuary we would wait until afterwards and have the food in the basement. I thought some of the older folk might not be cool with pizza in the sanctuary. But they were actually the ones who wanted it beforehand. So some people got it before the show, and the 4 pizzas we started with (2 pepperoni; 2 cheese) were almost gone by the time we started at 6, so Jane had 3 more delivered. Then we set up a table in the hallway and had water and pop in coolers (one with water; one with coke/diet coke). I also decided we would give it away for free, and I put out a coffee can if someone wanted to donate some money. We got rid of all but 2 pieces of pizza and about half the pop/water, and took in $53. That's probably better than we did when we charged money. I don't know which is better. Don't really care.

We also had a pretty good crowd. Probably about 60. And there were several families that live in the area who saw our sign and decided to drop in. I was glad about that. Probably a fairly even split between church people and people not from our church. I still don't understand why more church people don't attend stuff like this. Eternal mystery. Whatever.

My eyes are dry
My faith is old
My heart is hard
My prayers are cold
And I know how I ought to be
Alive to You and dead to me

Keith Green, My Eyes Are Dry, from the album Make My Life a Prayer to You: Songs of Devotion

Friday, July 11, 2008

Preaching thoughts

Last Sunday I had someone else preach even though I was there. He is a ministry student, and he told me he needed to preach some sermons for a class, and how hard it was to find places to preach, because the pastor at his home church wouldn't let him preach there (it's a big church, and "not just anyone can be in the pulpit"). That's not exactly what he said, but that's how I took it. So I told him he could preach at our church if he wanted to.

Part of the reason I did that is because I kinda know how he feels. I have never been asked to preach at my home church, and I have to admit, it kinda hurts. I guess I did preach there once, right after I got done with seminary. But I've never been asked after becoming a preacher. I think I've changed a little between then and now. This was the church where I became a Christian; where I was baptized; I was a member of the church; I had served on the board; Jane and her family attended there their whole lives; I lived in this town my whole life; my parents now attend there; they paid for part of my seminary tuition. And it's not like it's a big church either. I mean, it's bigger than the one I pastor, but it's just a couple hundred people. I dunno, it's not a real big issue, but when this guy told me how disappointed he was that his home church wouldn't let him preach, I didn't tell him, but it got me to thinking how I've always been disappointed about that too.

Although, I have to admit... I kinda had an attitude when I left our home church and went to seminary. I thought I was better than them. I didn't like how things were done, and I wanted to pastor a church that "did things right." Yeah... we all know how much of an idiot I can be. I was, and I'm sure there were some people who knew it; so I don't hold it against them. It took me quite awhile to realize just how nice of a church it is. Live and learn.

I haven't been very good about helping people develop in their preaching lately. It's been awhile since I've asked Jane to preach (she's done it 2 or 3 times), and one of our council members has a couple times. I once had a goal that I wanted to preach no more than 35 times out of the year. The rest of the time would be filled with a couple of "good" preachers, some developing preachers (or students), and maybe do some other stuff now and then too. I kinda forgot about that. [reminding self]

I dunno. I'm just rambling...

This and that #286

Several things swimming around in my head. I hope none of them drown when Jane leaves me this weekend. Oh, she's coming back. Just a quick trip back home. Then next weekend we're both making the jaunt (with dog). Note - remember to feed Bogie while Jane is gone!

ITCH
Man, I have had this all-over-my-freakin-body itch for several days now. It started out in one area, then pretty soon I had it somewhere else, and all of a sudden I just itch all over. AND IT'S DRIVING ME NUTS!!! I've been taking antihistamines, and I stopped taking the niacin to see if maybe I was having an allergic reaction to that or something. I dunno. Not sure how much longer I can take it. It's hard to think straight. And curved thinking will get you nowhere. My ear has started hurting again too. Grrrr.

DEER
Last night we saw someone hit a deer. Actually, the deer ran into the side of their car. They were right in front of us - so another couple of seconds and it would have been running into our car (which has happened before). I didn't even see it until I saw the vehicle swerve, and the deer was hitting the ground with legs a'flailing. Then it started flopping around and I thought it was going to be ugly. But all of a sudden it kinda shook its head... and ran off into the corn field. Of course the couple in the vehicle had a little girl with them who was totally freaking out. So we stopped and assured them that the deer did finally get up and appeared to be ok. It broke the passenger side rearview mirror off - shattering some of the glass inside because the window was down, it also dented the front right fender pretty bad. I was sorry about their car, but I was really glad we didn't have to watch the deer flop around and die. We stayed until they had called the cops and had settled down.

CELL PHONES
Let me tell you... I do not really like cell phones all that much, even though I do have one, and use it occasionally. But it irritates me to no end how rude some people are with them. Maybe I'm just old fashioned, but I hate it when you're standing in line at a store or ordering food or something, and someone is talking on the phone. Like, how freakin' important can your call be? If it's that important that you can't call back, then GET OUTTA LINE! But get this... the other morning we were at a McDonald's and the PERSON TAKING OUR ORDER was on the phone. It was actually THE SUPERVISOR. It didn't appear to be work related, and she continued to talk on the phone not only while taking our order, but she was still on it (and talking) the whole time she bagged our order up and when she gave it to us. Unbelievable.

SERMON
I actually had to write a sermon again this week (though I won't again for the next two weeks), and I had a really hard time. Not because I forgot how (the people in my church might say I never knew how to begin with), but because of the subject matter and the length. We're having a child dedication service Sunday, and I had been preaching from Proverbs this summer, so I was going to preach on Proverbs 22:6 - "train a child in the way they should go..." Also, I wanted to make it short, and add a video into the sermon, because the parents of one of the people are both deaf and they don't attend services normally, so I thought it would be a good time to add some visual imagery instead of just someone moving their mouth. Anyway, it was hard because there is A LOT I would like to say about parenting. And in order to say some of what I want to say I need to offer a lot of explanation, because some of it could be pretty harsh. But I had to cut so much out to fit it into the timeframe, so I don't know. That's the struggle for me with every sermon. It's not how to come up with something to say; it's how to decide what to cut out.

BIBLE STUDY
While I'm on a roll... I have actually been surprised at how good this Wednesday Night B.S. is that we're having. It's on Christianity, Cults & Religions. It's nothing but some powerpoint slides on different cults and religions (I think it's from Rose Publishing), and it doesn't go very in-depth at all, but just the basics about what everyone believes about God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, and what their basic views are of salvation, and death, and whatnot. I totally did not want to do this, but some people asked for it (and they actually attended too - I was surprised!), and it's been pretty good. But the other night I noticed that of the ten or so people that are usually there, we seem to be down to one guy - an older gentleman who comes with his wife (and they live right across the street from the church). I certainly have nothing against women, but I think it does say something about a church that has a shortage of guys interested in discipleship. And what's worse is - there used to be quite a few. But now there aren't. Another one of those things that nags me with the "is it me, or them" question.

Well, I need to finish mowing. I'd like to get me a new pair of running shoes today too. We'll see. Sorry for the long post. And the rants.

Peace out; and in.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

A new car

We took our 2001 Taurus in because it was making a weird noise yesterday, and later that afternoon the mechanic called and told us it needs about $1100 worth of work done - two front axles, broken rear spring, shocks & struts, and that didn't include the fact that it needs new tires. I trust our mechanic, and we actually get a bit of a discount because I'm their pastor, so it's not like we're being "taken" or anything. That's what happens to a car with 160,000 miles on it. We ended up just having the axles replaced for under $500. That's still a major chunk of change.

So we started talking about maybe getting a different car. We still have a 2002 Buick Century that we would use for long trips or when we need to haul people around. But it has almost 130,000 miles on it. The truck is for special occasions only. The brakes are about shot now. So we're looking for something small, and inexpensive. I saw this article today on The 10 Most Fuel Efficient Cars in The U.S. and thought that was pretty timely. I hate buying new cars though (well, used ones in our case). Too much left to chance, and it stresses me out. Sometimes I wonder if it would be better to buy a new one. In looking at this list, I think the Toyota Yaris and the Honda Fit look like possibilities. But... We haven't had a car payment in a really long time. And I'm just not up on what's a good deal and what's not. So I dunno. Jane would like to get an old Jeep.

Any suggestions?

A prayer

This is a prayer I've been using lately. I've had it taped to my wall for eons. I'm not sure now where I even picked it up. Somewhere. Anyway, I kinda like it. I wish I could memorize it. Maybe I'll print it off and stick it in my pocket.
Almighty God, infinite and eternal, you fill all things with your presence; you are everywhere by your essence and by your power; in heaven by glory, in holy places by your grace and favor, in the hearts of your servants by your Spirit, in the consciences of all people by your testimony and their observation of us. Teach me to walk always in your presence, to fear your majesty, to reverence your wisdom and omniscience; that I may never dare to commit any indecency in your eyes; but that I may with so much care and reverence demean myself that You, my Judge, may not be my accuser but my advocate; that I, expressing the belief of your presence here by careful walking, may feel the effects of it in the participation of eternal glory; through Jesus Christ. Amen.

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Tominthebox News Network

Ha! I found this site on Rick's blog. It is TBNN: Team TomintheBox News Network - theological news, fairly unbalanced. Hilarious stuff. I think they were the first to report that California courts were now recognizing heterosexual marriage. I also picked up this "We support the emerging lurch" banner.

I'm more proud than you are

Interesting. After the post yesterday... I read in Mere Christianity today about pride. C.S. Lewis says, "There is no fault which makes a man more unpopular, and no fault which we are more unconscious of in ourselves. And the more we have it ourselves, the more we dislike it in others" (121).

He also says...
(121-122) "According to Christian teachers, the essential vice, the utmost evil, is Pride. Unchastity, anger, greed, drunkenness, and all that are mere fleabites in comparison: it was through Pride that the devil became the devil: Pride leads to every other vice: it is the complete anti-God state of mind."


(122) "Does this seem to you exaggerated? If so, think it over. I pointed out a moment ago that the more pride one had, the more one disliked pride in others. In fact, if you want to find out how proud you are the easiest way is to ask yourself, 'How much do I dislike it when other people snub me, or refuse to take any notice of me, or shove their oar in, or patronise me, or show off? The point is that each person's pride is in competition with every one else's pride. It is because I wanted to be the big noise at the party that I am so annoyed at someone else being the big noise."

(122) "Now what you want to get clear is that Pride is ESSENTIALLY competitive - is competitive by its very nature - while the other vices are competitive only, so to speak, by accident. Pride gets no pleasure out of having something, only out of having more of it than the next man. We say that people are proud of being rich, or clever, or good-looking, but they are not. They are proud of being richer, or cleverer, or better-looking than others... It is the comparison that makes you proud."

(123-124) "...it is Pride which has been the chief cause of misery in every nation and every family since the world began. Other vices may sometimes bring people together: you may find good fellowship and jokes and friendliness among drunken people or chaste people. But pride always means enmity - it IS enmity. And not only enmity between man and man, but enmity to God."

(124) "A proud man is always looking down on things and people: and, of course, as long as you are looking down, you cannot see something that is above you."

(124-125) "Whenever we find our religious life is making us feel that we are good - above all, that we are better than someone else - I think we may be sure that we are being acted on, not by God, but by the devil. The real test of being in the presence of God is, that you either forget about yourself altogether or see yourself as a small, dirty object."

(125) "Pride is spiritual cancer: it eats up the very possibility of love, of contentment, or even common sense."

(126) "The real black, diabolical Pride, comes when you look down on others so much that you do not care what they think of you."

I could have just written out the entire chapter. You know, to be honest, I've always thought I was somewhat humble (at least more humble than you!). But I think pride might be a problem for me. I've never noticed it, but C.S. kinda nailed me on some things here. Hmm. This was a good chapter for me. My toes hurt.

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Just so you know

Just so everybody knows... I do not presently use any illegal drugs, nor do I condone their use. I honestly cannot even remember the last time I did. The same goes for abusing drugs - legal or illegal. The truth is, though, even though I know it was stupid to have done so in the past, there are other stupid things people can do too. Just because you've never used or abused drugs doesn't mean you're better than anybody else. It doesn't mean you're worse either.

Every now and then someone will tell me I need to tell more stories about all the bad things I have done (when I preach). I think there are various reasons people want to see someone do this - and some might even be good. I have never liked doing so. For one thing, I think it can be a pride thing to try to boast about how "bad" you used to be. For another... I really wish I had never touched any of it and I don't want to glamorize it in the least. I regret the damage drugs have done to me; and, yes, there is some. I know people who have never so much as tasted a sip of alcohol, and I think that would be awesome. Sure, some people say, "But you can tell people how much God has saved you from; how much He has changed you." And I say He needed to save me and change me even without the drugs - and how much better it would be to have never done them at all.

Anyway... I just wanted to clear that up. Drugs are bad. But maybe not as bad as thinking you're better than somebody else.

The order of service

Our church bulletins for Sunday morning aren't too fancy. An 8 1/2 x 11 sheet of white paper, folded in half. On the front I put "What To Expect Today." Below is what has been underneath of that for the last month or so. We won't be doing it like this the next few weeks because we're doing other stuff, and I haven't decided yet whether to go back to this, back to what it was before, or what. I have no idea if people have liked it or not. It's hard to get feedback. Though several people have said they like how you go up and get your own communion stuff and take it in your own way. We've had communion for six Sundays in a row. I think that's a record for us. Anyway, this is what it has been for June and so far in July:

Gathering Together –

Announcements, Scripture Readings, and a song or two to get us focused.


Praying Together –

When we combine our hearts and minds as a group and call on God to be present in us, among us, and through us.


Learning Together –

A message from the Bible, or about the Bible, to guide us and teach us in the ways of Jesus.


Giving & Receiving Together –

Those who are followers of Christ may bring their tithes & offerings and place them in the plate (it is not necessary for visitors or unbelievers to give), and all who desire may take the communion elements and return to your seat to receive the bread and the cup. We will also give praise to God in song and prayer during this time.


Monday, July 07, 2008

Welcoming a new pastor

I don't think I've seen this before, but Brian McLaren has the Ten Commandments for Welcoming a New Pastor. I think they're pretty good. Amazing how much of a difference some of them can make.

Every now and then I am reminded of something that's happened over the last nine years since I've been a pastor. Wow. I don't like to even think about a lot of it. Oh, not that it's all been bad. There has been a lot of good too. I don't think too much about the bad or the good though. Usually I'm trying to think about the present and the future. I don't see much point in dwelling on the past. I used to keep pretty extensive notes about events and conversations though... so someday it might be interesting to read back through some of it.

Church website

I renewed the church domain name for another three years today. I wish we had something other than www.fairviewlife.com, but that was the best I could come up with in 2003 from what was available. I wish I could get www.fairviewchurch.com, or www.fairview.com, or either of them with a .org even. Too late on the draw I guess. I don't know that it really matters all that much anyway.

BW3 on pagan christianity

I've had this post set to publish for a few days. I didn't realize Ben Witherington's review of Pagan Christianity would start the fight all over again, but I really just wanted a place to store his posts so I could read them in their entirety later. I don't really care to say anything more about the book or any responses to it. Ben's reviews are here: BW3 on PC1; BW3 on PC2; BW3 on PC3; and BW3 on PC4.

Sunday, July 06, 2008

Track on tv

I admit it... I love to watch track & field on television. Especially the sprints. I don't think I'm gay (not that there's anything wrong with that), but the chiseled bodies of the 100, 200, and 400 meter runners blasting down the track is a thing of sheer beauty to me. Plus, you know, *I* was a sprinter at one time. I believe I've said before that I actually started college on a track scholarship.

Yesterday I watched the men's 200 meter qualifier for the US Olympic team, and I was bummed to see Tyson Gay go down. I liked him, and hope he is alright. I was also interested to see Wallace Spearman. His dad was one of the big names when I was in high school. I remember him, and Sunder Nix, and Michael Conley Sr. (who I actually ran against). I know Mike and Sunder were both Olympic champions eventually. Mike's son is now in the NBA, and I was surprised to see that Sunder is now a track coach at Ball State University - just down the road from us. I remember watching him run the 400 meters in high school, and he had a kick like I had never seen before in my life. It dropped my jaw to the floor.

Anyway, I am looking forward to watching more track and field with the Olympics coming up.

Peace out; and in.

Friday, July 04, 2008

Even the losers get lucky sometimes

We saw Tom Petty in concert last night at the Verizon Music Center. I suppose this was kind of our "family vacation" for the year. All six of us got to go: me, Jane, Carrie, Isaac, and the boyfriend and girlfriend (that would be Drew and Laura, respectively). We all rode down together except poor Laura, who had to drive there by herself from Cincinnati. I felt bad about that, as I would have freaked out in that traffic by myself. Isaac left with her though, and Drew Carrie stayed in Indy with some friends, so it was just me and m'lady on the way home.

Anyway, this was my first concert at Verizon. What an awesome venue. I think I read where they can hold 24,000. We didn't really even have that much trouble getting in and out - though we left at the first encore. And the weather was great. I even ended up putting my hoody on. The weed was a bit overwhelming though. We smelled it the minute we opened the car door, and a big group right in front of us and beside us were passing joints ALL night long. Man... I'm going to have the munchies for a week!

Other than that, and long port-a-potty lines, it was a great night. Steve Winwood opened, and I think I actually liked his show better. I'd forgotten how many popular songs he had, and I looove his guitar playing. Plus I was still able to lay down and listen to Steve. Once Tom started it was standing room only.

Petty was Petty. There is no pretense with him - he's not much of a showman, but just plays a song, thanks people for applauding, and plays another song. He did a solid 2 hours, after Stevie played for one. Tom reminds me of many of the people I used to hang/work with back home. Plus he's kind of a slow talker like me, so I feel a certain bond.

We did see a few people we knew. When we were entering we saw two people who used to attend our church. I wish they still did. I always really liked them, and can't remember now why they quit. We also saw the father of a friend of Carrie's who is a Fort Wayne school teacher. Of course Carrie ran into people she knew about 20 feet from our car, and she had all kinds of friends there.

It was actually a bit of an emotional evening for me. I wasn't expecting that. But most of my favorite Petty songs were from the 1979-1981 era. That's when my best friend (also my best man) and I listened to 'Damn the Torpedoes' nonstop. So it brought back a lot of memories about him. I think I've blogged before about the freakish way he died. And it was also during that time - on the fourth of July - when Jane's dad died. So when they kicked in with "Even The Losers" I started tearing up immediately. What a poor sap I am -crying at a danged Tom Petty concert. Anyway, I thought about my old friend for quite awhile after that; and Jane's dad.

Here are some pictures I took with my phone...

The lovely Lady sitting pretty.

Our view of the stage. And this was before it started. There was no green showing once the music started.

A crowd shot. We were in the far left of the outfield, about halfway up the hill. We had a nice view of the tv screen.

It was a nice night, and a good concert... but for some reason I remember thinking at one point that a little bit of a dream might have died. I don't even know what that means, really.

Thursday, July 03, 2008

What have I become

I think I've become one of those people I always hoped I never would be. You know, those crotchety old men who are opposed to anything and everything. How does this happen?

I always used to love my tribe. I've even been called a "denominational boy". I used to speak regularly about how wonderful our group was from the pulpit and in everyday conversations. But I seem to have developed this bad taste in my mouth. And I don't think it's just because change is on the horizon. I like change. I think it has more to do with how it's coming about. I feel like we're being duped into something; there are too many secrets; there's too much "we can't say anything until it's gone through proper channels" sorta stuff. Maybe it's the feeling of being disregarded that bothers me the most. And not just me, but all of us who "don't matter."

So I found myself thinking today that I don't care what the change is - they've lost my support and I won't back it. Which is stupid, I know. But allegiance is a fickle friend.

I don't like being like this. God, help.

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Do ya think I'm sexy

Rod was on the rad(io) this morning; and then I took in my daily dose of Mere Christianity, and it was the chapter on 'Sexual Morality.' And... since there are about ten different things weighing heavy on my mind, none of which I can talk about, I thought I'd give you some sex with C.S. Lewis.

On p.95 he says:
Chastity is the most unpopular of the Christian virtues. There is no getting away from it; the Christian rule is, 'Either marriage, with complete faithfulness to your partner, or else total abstinence.' Now this is so difficult and so contrary to our instincts, that obviously either Christianity is wrong or our sexual instinct, as it now is, has gone wrong. One or the other. Of course, being a Christian, I think it is the instinct which has gone wrong.

He then compares and contrasts our appetites for sex and for food. Generally we become most warped through an over-indulgence. But I thought it interesting what he had to say about those who believe they are unable to resist. On 101 he says...
We may, indeed, be sure that perfect chastity - like perfect charity - will not be attained by any merely human efforts. You must ask for God's help. Even when you have done so, it may seem to you for a long time that no help, or less help than you need, is being given. Never mind. After each failure, ask forgiveness, pick yourself up, and try again. Very often what God first helps us towards is not the virtue itself but just this power of always trying again. For however important chastity (or courage, or truthfulness, or any other virtue) may be, this process trains us in habits of the soul which are more important still. It cures our illusions about ourselves and teaches us to depend on God. We learn, on the one hand, that we cannot trust ourselves even in our best moments, and, on the other, that we need not despair even in our worst, for our failures are forgiven. The only fatal thing is to sit down content with anything less than perfection.

Ooh, baby. Process...

A great one-liner on p. 102: "Virtue - even attempted virtue - brings light; indulgence brings fog." Yep, too often we seem to think we gain better understanding by giving in to indulgences. That usually just lends itself to a cloudier vision until we're completely unable to see our wrong. Yesterday I read on p. 93, "When a man is getting worse he understands his own badness less and less. A moderately bad man knows he is not very good: a thoroughly bad man thinks he is all right."

And he saves perhaps the best for last with this gem on pp. 102-103:
Finally, though, I have had to speak at some length about sex, I want to make it as clear as I possibly can that the centre of Christian morality is not here. If anyone thinks that Christians regard unchastity as the supreme vice, he is quite wrong. The sins of the flesh are bad, but they are the least bad of all sins. All the worst pleasures are purely spiritual: the pleasure of putting other people in the wrong, of bossing and patronizing and spoiling sport, and back-biting, the pleasures of power, of hatred. For there are two things inside me, competing with the human self which I must try to become. They are the Animal self, and the Diabolical self. The Diabolical self is the worse of the two. That is why a cold, self-righteous prig who goes regularly to church may be far nearer to hell than a prostitute. But, of course, it is better to be neither.

Amen.

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Converting youtube videos to powerpoint

I was finally able to convert a Youtube video so it would work in Powerpoint 2003 on my computer. There are all kinds of places that "say" they can do it, but for some reason none of them worked for me. But I finally stumbled onto Zamzar, and after a few tries, got the job done. I was converting an flv file, and I had to convert it to an mpg file before it would work. I tried mp4, and avi, but neither of them worked correctly on my version of Powerpoint. So I am glad to have that over with.

I didn't actually join or register with Zamzar, but put the thingy on my browser bar, and when I go to the youtube video I want, I click on the Zamzar thing, and then select the format, put my email address in (I've never received any junk mail from them), and convert. Pretty soon they email me the place to download from, I download it, and presto/chango... it works! Cool.