Thursday, July 03, 2008

What have I become

I think I've become one of those people I always hoped I never would be. You know, those crotchety old men who are opposed to anything and everything. How does this happen?

I always used to love my tribe. I've even been called a "denominational boy". I used to speak regularly about how wonderful our group was from the pulpit and in everyday conversations. But I seem to have developed this bad taste in my mouth. And I don't think it's just because change is on the horizon. I like change. I think it has more to do with how it's coming about. I feel like we're being duped into something; there are too many secrets; there's too much "we can't say anything until it's gone through proper channels" sorta stuff. Maybe it's the feeling of being disregarded that bothers me the most. And not just me, but all of us who "don't matter."

So I found myself thinking today that I don't care what the change is - they've lost my support and I won't back it. Which is stupid, I know. But allegiance is a fickle friend.

I don't like being like this. God, help.