Thursday, September 03, 2009

The most loving place - pt. 2

It has been hard to highlight specifics in Ken Blanchard and Phil Hodges book The Most Loving Place in Town. Not because it's not good - it just doesn't fit well with my normal format, and would probably be better with an overall review. But... there were some tidbits in chapter 10 that are worth putting here though.

On p. 76-77 he says, "It's easier to forgive other people because it's a one-way process. The only decision I have to make is to be willing to give forgiveness, and then my part is done. But to forgive myself, I have to be willing to give forgiveness and accept it as well." Excellent point.

On p. 78... "To have your self-esteem up for grabs every day based on how well you perform or what other people think of you is to live an always anxious, always at-risk, never secure, never satisfied life. High sensitivity to negative feedback is a sure symptom of this kind of self-centered thinking. Any indications that your performance is inadequate or your reputation is at risk quickly become a threat to the safety of your self-esteem, to be resisted or denied." Ouch! (but true)

Also on p. 78... "While God is merciful and forgiving, my pride sure isn't! It seems that if I forgive myself, my pride will lose its right to punish me for the damage its suffered. And it's not finished beating me up yet!" Yeah...

Highlights at the end of the chapter on p. 79:
  • Get your ego out of the way, and ask for help when you need it.
  • Give yourself some slack - leave room for God's grace.
  • Recognize that forgiveness starts with yourself.
Lots of good stuff in a short little chapter in a short little book. I think I shall re-read this chapter a third time.