Friday, October 06, 2006

Expectations

Someone suggested to me that I needed more readers. I'm not sure why, but I've been uncomfortable ever since. Now, please understand, I appreciate all the people who bother to read this blog. I think you're probably a little wacked, but I love ya nonetheless. :) But I don't know that I'm all that innarested in getting more readers. I mean, not that I don't like being linked to and such, but sometimes I write some wierd stuff; personal stuff; stuff that I don't always want everyone in the world to know. Just so you understand, I write on this blog for myself. You can call it selfish if you like, but I call it therapy.

Anyway, it reminded me of something I wrote last year:
I was reading where Bono said Bob Dylan gave him some good advice on handling "celebrity status." And I am by no means a celebrity, but it was more dealing with how to handle expectations. Dylan said you have to let people down on a regular basis. You can't try to live up to people's expectations or it will kill you, or drive you to do stupid, unhealthy things. I can really relate to that. Too often I think I have to fulfill someone's expectations - even if they are false. It's a hard place to be. Because I want to please people. But it does no good to always please people if I am always miserable. And it can be hard to find that balance. You know, especially for me, because I'm not naturally a people person. I need space. I'm difficult. I get moody and don't always make sense. But I've got to learn to accept that. If you don't accept yourself and love yourself... you'll be miserable. And I'm much better than I used to be. I still wish it were easier though.
So... that's like what I was just thinking about. In case you were wondering.

Peace. Gotta mow today. A mowing revolution. Backwards.

2 comments:

Emily said...

Nope. I don't know Vicki or Eric Pratt. Did I get there names right? lol

Anyways, I just had to comment on this blog. Because that is almost exactly how I feel. I'm not naturally a people person either. I get really edgy and irritated if I'm around people a long time. But it frustrates me because I wonder how am i supposed to help other people if i'm like this. you know what i mean? God has put it on my heart to help people with their health. I'm not sure where that is going to lead, but it's this passion of mine. I've been studying alot about health. IT's my dream to help people overcome their sickness. But if I'm not a people person how am i supposed to do this? I've just been wondering about that lately. Ugh..life can be complicated sometimes.

Emily

dan said...

Hi Emily,
I certainly understand your frustration. Part of the problem is that we 'do' sometimes need to try to better relate to people (at least I do). But we also need to remember that just because someone is an introvert doesn't make them a lesser person. The world needs introverts too. I would think 'especially' in the heatlh field. If researchers and scientists spent all their time doing "people things", when would they do research and lab work? So... hang in there. :)
peace,
dh