Too many churches are led by wounded pastors and leaders who can’t really love people or be vulnerable or focus on the future because of past rejection and hurt. But there is healing for wounded leaders!
There are a lot of things that wound us in life. Maybe you were wounded because somebody lied to you. Maybe a promise was made to you that was broken. Or maybe you were in a conflict with a church member or fellow leader. In that conflict some angry words were said and you were deeply wounded. Maybe you were wounded by a betrayal, by rejection, or by being misunderstood. You may have been wounded by being devalued, overlooked, or not valued enough. And you can be wounded by loneliness.
Yep, that about covers it. And I say that not to point the finger at anyone specifically. These things happen. But at some point we need to get over it and move on. I will let you read Rick's article to see how he proposes we do that (and I hope my wife will read it). He does point us to Psalm 37:8 though: “Let go of anger and leave your rage behind. Do not be preoccupied. It only leads to evil.”
There was also a good follow-up article by Ken Quick "Taming Resentment at Church." It fit nicely too.
I take no pride in being a 'wounded leader,' but I'm not afraid to admit it either. I know/knew I needed help, and I am working my way through it. I am very grateful for a congregation who mostly saw the value and need as well. I am also grateful for the many friends who - whether they know it or not - are helping me through the process.
I latched onto a song lyric from Jason Ringenberg some time ago that I haven't thought of in awhile: "Only gypsies are made in a day." I have nothing against gypsies, but the idea is.... things take time; and we can choose what we want to be working towards. My daughter had a lovely post (which brought a tear to my eye as well) on her blog the other day (http://bornbeforethewind.blogspot.com/2013/06/choice.html).
So.... there ya go. It's a Wednesday; the sun is shining; I've got a belly full of happy pills.... I'm feeling okay for the moment.
Peace out; and in.