Are you in love with jesus?

One of my favorite books from my days in seminary was Henri Nouwen's 'In the Name of Jesus: Reflections on Christian Leadership.' I think it means a totally different thing to me today than it did then, but it is still a wonderful book.

In my devotions this morning a writer has quoted from that book:

“The question is not: How many people take you seriously? How much are you going to accomplish? Can you show some results? But: Are you in love with Jesus? . . . In our world of loneliness and despair, there is an enormous need for men and women who know the heart of God, a heart that forgives, that cares, that reaches out and wants to heal.”

I have been pretty wrapped up lately in how much my heart has been hurt (and my wife and daughter's), and this little snippet reinforced one of the great points of the recent Ragamuffin movie we saw: Do I know that God loves me? That Jesus loves me? And do I love him?

If Jesus' mission in life is somehow wrapped up in the 'reconciling of all things'... then am I living out of his love in that direction, or am I living out of fear and regret and guilt? Am I more in love with Jesus or with preserving my own integrity, or being "right," or fitting in, or... whatever?

Right now, I don't know. Right now, I want to go to work, do my job, be nice to people, practice smiling, and get to know Jesus as best as I can. What about you?