Saturday, September 13, 2014

A perspective from the pastor's spouse

My wife left this as a comment a few posts back. If you don't know the back story, I'm sorry but I don't care to rehash it again. I thought this was beautifully worded, and worth keeping. While there is much I could say, want to say, and maybe should say... For now I'm just going to post it and leave it at that.
I could go back and comment on several of your recent posts, but I'll just put it all into this one.

I do still believe in the church and friendships - even though this past year it has been somewhat hard. I think the worst part of the whole church situation is thinking that you have found a common understanding with four or five people where you want the church to really try to reflect what you believe God intended the church to be. You know where you live life in such a way that you can depend on one another, you can share in the struggles as well as the joys. You can be honest about the problems in your marriage, how your kids have maybe messed up or made decisions that you don't understand. How you struggle with doing what you know is wrong but you just don't have the strength to stop...or start...or whatever the case may be. How when people are at their lowest, you don't let them down. And of course, when we all fail at those things at some point, you help each other work through it all in an attempt to bring healing and to show the world...this is why the church is different. Maybe that group of people has found all of that without us - and if so - well, good for them. But as far as we are concerned, when we were at a low point, they let us down. I understand that when someone is drowning, you have to wait for them to stop struggling before you can pull them out. I guess they waited for the struggle to stop and then decided to walk away. That second, key part of the equation never happened. I suppose it was all less messy least for them.

It's funny how people want to claim credit for their influence when everything turns out well, but no one wants to take responsibility for their influence when it doesn't. I will be the first to admit that we all do have to take responsibilities for our own thoughts, actions, beliefs. But if that's all we're responsible for, then I don't understand anything at all.

1 comment:

MR said...

I think JAH's comments are kind of ironic. Here she's talking about how she was trying to create a place that would provide unconditional support and it failed. I would add it was intercepted by a prejudiced people who haven't even bothered to Google "depression" yet. So that's that, I guess.

Oh...unless you count reinventing yourself to reinforce your family in it's time of need. Stepping to the plate and bringing them to a place of less obligation, and less stress while still maintaining every duty of wife, mother, grandmother. I guess there's that part.

...drinks Guiness, too.