Another old friend has died (and why I work out)

The other night I was scrolling through Facebook and discovered an old friend and classmate had died. He was 57, the same as me. According to comments, he'd apparently had a heart attack.

Kevin was a year ahead of me in school. His brother Dennis was actually in my class. They ended up in a neighboring town later on, but we all still stayed connected. Kevin and I ended up working together in this small gas station along I-80 when we were in high school and just beyond, so we hung out quite a bit in our late teens and twenties.

When he left the gas station he started working on a barge on the Illinois River. Apparently that's what he was still doing. It was not easy work, and I imagine Kevin was still pretty strong because of it, as he always had been.

So, discovering he'd dropped dead from a heart attack was a bit of a shock. Sure, he'd always smoked cigarettes and partied when I knew him. So did I. I have no idea what his life had been like lately though. It's more the thought. It could happen. Any day. To anyone.

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As I forced myself to go to the gym yesterday, I was thinking about why I workout and try to eat right. Honestly, and not to be morbid, but it's not at all to live LONGER. Not that I'm ready to die, but I am not clinging to this life. In fact, I hope I go long before my mind and body give out. That's not for me to decide though (ultimately).

I workout and try to take care of myself for QUALITY OF LIFE reasons, more than length of life. I simply enjoy FEELING good - physically and emotionally. I know what I feel like when I don't take care of myself, and it's not something I enjoy.

So, in the end, I guess I merely want to live while I'm alive. There ARE things we can do - to some extent - to help us be mentally and physically alert, engaged, and able to enjoy life. I want to do those things because I want to be that way!

Ultimately, we will all meet our maker at some point. Until that time, I hope to work at living. As Jason Ringenberg so poignantly penned, "The point is dying if we don't live when we're alive."

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RIP, my old friend. We had some good times. Until we meet again (if we do), I am going to have some more. They are a bit different than the one's we used to enjoy, and hopefully better for me.