Can't Sleep

It is 1:26 am and I can't get to sleep. Not sure why.

I'm kind of sad because tonight was my son's last night of playing with his high school pep band. He's a senior and this was the last home game. He plays guitar. He's done the solo on 'The Bull's Theme' when they do introductions and start the game all four years. This year he sang some too. And most games he, Graham & Aaron (The AGI Experience; or Sundays Off) usually play a song or two afterwards. Tonight they did 3 songs. It was great. A ton of people just hang around afterward and listen/watch them. I am going to miss seeing him play. I hope he keeps playing, and singing, when he goes to college. He's actually become a fairly decent singer, and he's always been a good electric guitarist.

All around, today was a decent day even though I didn't do anything I planned to do. Some days are like that, I guess. I'm trying to force myself to "go with the flow" more. And I spontaneously took someone to lunch too. That was a big step for me - both because I don't usually "do" lunch, and because it's a stretch for me to invite someone to go out. It's a temptation for me to be a bit reclusive.

I don't want to be a recluse. Honestly though, it's just easier. You know, I'm naturally shy. Plus I have a fairly low self-esteem. So it takes quite a bit for me to r-e-a-c-h o-u-t there. And, many times, when I try, I end up making a fool out of myself. Or I end up doing or saying something I regret later. I'm not what you would call a 'people person.' It's not that I don't like people. It just takes so much effort for me to interact. That's why I'm so amazed by my kids... because they're both so outgoing. I wish I were more like them.

By the way, they both had a GREAT time at the Sigur Ros show last night. I wish I'd gone. They took a kid who had never been to a concert before and told him he can never attend another one. SR was just too good. I see John Prine is coming to the Murat Centre in a month or so. I wouldn't mind attending that. He's one of those songwriter's that can make you laugh and cry at the same time.

Well, this is probably a much too long post already. And surely boring. I should probably check to see if the fighting illini won tonight. Good night.