Okay, so, I've been a bit busy lately. I haven't written a decent blog post in I-don't-know-how-long, but... I just had the strangest conversation. The cleaning lady was here, and she is a really nice lady, but she said something that just about blew my mind. She says to me, "I feel so sorry for you that you have to come and sit here all day. Can't you find anything else to do?" Whehahahahhaha... So I tried to explain to her that I study, and pray, and read, and write sermons, and plan things, and strategize, and whatnot. I'm still not sure she thinks it's anything more than "just sitting here." She actually thought I just came to the office everyday and waited for the phone to ring or for someone to come in. Hmm. I don't know if I should laugh or cry.
Anyway, I actually did have a really good idea for a post last night. It was about 3:30 this morning, and I remember debating whether I should get up and write it down or not. But I thought it was so good that I would surely remember it. Bummer. I cannot for the life of me think what it was now. I need one of those astronaut pens that writes upside down so I can scribble things while I'm lying in bed.
I don't know why I seem so busy lately. Maybe it's just the getting ready for this Sunday, Christmas Eve, and trying to get a jump start on the following Sunday and the Annual Congregational meeting, and the kids coming home, and...
Oh, and I haven't even blogged about Jane's blowout the other night. Monday she wasn't feeling well (cold), but had to go to class after work because they were taking their final. So she's heading to Huntington right before dark and a rear tire blows out on the car. She pulled off on a country road out by GM and it hadn't even been plowed yet. She called me, but before I was even a mile from home someone had already stopped and changed the tire for her. She said she actually had several people stop to make sure she was okay. Very nice.
Someone just came in. Gotta go.
9 comments:
I remember early in my first full-time church. They weren't paying me enough to live on. I had some computer programming I had contracted to do to supplement my income. I remember one deacon said, "If your sermon is done, and the phone isn't ringing, I don't care what you do."
I'm going to try to be as diplomatic as I can about the cleaning woman, but I think it speaks more to her.... nature... that she can't imagine there's anything happening if you're standing still. I've actually had to explain "mental exhaustion" to people before. They understand physical exhaustion, you dig a ditch, pull a muscle, that sort of thing... but to them thinking, and solving problems isn't real work. I can only imagine their mind is a cramped room and they don't want to spend a lot of time there. I had a blog entry long ago about being white collar (not so figurative in your case) in blue collar Indiana that I think might apply here. Usually I resort to saying "let's put it this way, when I was a consultant, they billed $100 an hour for me to think." Money they understand. (boy, I play my own horn well, did you hear that?)
Those astronaut pens are dangerous without the little pig-tail cord. How'd you like to be walking along in the International Space Station and get poked in the eye with a pen that's floating around?
Gee, I feel bad, I SAW Jane out there, but I just honked and waved. It all makes sense now.
I'm not sure I think $100 an hour worth, but... yeah. :)
And even among white collar/ blue collar - I believe there are different "types." Even more specifically as a pastor, I know some who are very much "doers" and they have an uncanny ability to think on their feet. But it takes some of us a long, long time to come up with thoughts. One is not better than the other (IMHO), but they are just different.
BTW, Jane saw that you saw her and she deliberately didn't honk or wave back. =/
What is it with us Horwedel women and the ability to ruin a good tire?
Hehe... yeah, that's what I'd like to know. :)
Tires aside, I think the problem isn't that people can't imagine a contemplative life (though they probably can't). The problem lies in the institutionalization of the church. The pastor writes sermons and visits. He likely has a prayer list, which he works through after an hour of 5AM devotions.
When people call me, they seem to have one of two notions about my time. One, "no way you can be busy. If you put me off, it only speaks to how awful a pastor you are." Or two, "I know you are very busy, but..." I suspect neither knows much about the busyness of my day.
And at the same time, my day is extremely flexible. Perhaps too much so, in that it requires discipline to be effective as well as discipline to be contemplative.
I feel at my best when I have regular leadership meetings (not so much decision making, but discipleship type meetings) on a weekly basis. I feel like I am investing in myself so that I can invest and others and see fruit. Otherwise I get discouraged. Investing in others (though encouraged by institutional thought) is usually difficult in the institution.
Brian,
I agree with you about the regular leadership meetings. That is one of my biggest sources of discouragement - when it appears no one is interested in discipleship. I bought a couple books that I'm hoping will help me get better at that. While I get a lot from it, it is unfortunately something I've never been too good at. Thanks for the input.
Here's what I've found. There is a bit to be said about skill of being a discipler, but there is more to be said about people who want to be discipled. Forgive me if I'm overusing the word "institutional," but in my institutional days, no one wanted to be discipled. They might argue that point, but they didn't want to pray together, or study together, or serve together.
But since I planted a church, there have been hot and cold spells of people who want to be discipled. It is at that point that I've learned whether I am good at it or not.
Right now, I have about five people who want to meet with me weekly and be discipled through Scripture. Two of them no longer come to our church, which is often baffling, but they still long to be discipled. The other three will become our first Home Group leaders starting in January.
These people who want to be discipled aren't just looking for Bible information, they want their own lives to be different, and they all have a desire to help others be different.
After reading Simple Church, I decided to put everything into one pot. My sermons will be based on what I call Classic Scriptures. The Home Groups will meet twice a month to study the Classic Scriptures and the corresponding issue. Regular Bible reading will be in these Classic Scriptures and other Scriptures that speak to the issue.
I'm very excited about what could occur. I dread to find out that I overshot. But this wouldn't work at all if people weren't hungry to be discipled.
Brian,
Yeah, I think you're right. I'm not exactly sure I understand all the differences you're talking about between "institutional" church and your church now. Were your two churches THAT different? Sometimes I get thrown by this because, even though I am in an old, country church, I don't think we are at all "institutional." I think I remember that you once even said to me my church was a "miracle" or something like that. And at times it is. At other times we revert back to old tendencies though. So... I say all that to ask what it is you think differentiates between "institutional" and... whatever you would call what you have now?
Also, the one book I'm hoping to read soon is "Down To Earth Discipling." It's supposed to be a "discipleship for dummies" approach. It sounds similar to what you're doing (Not meaning to insinuate you're a dummy).
I think a big thing for people is seeing discipleship, or studying the Bible, or praying, or just church in general - not as something to "do" or someplace to "be"... but to begin seeing these things as ways to BECOME (more like Jesus). I would like to see our church become more interested in getting together to practice the spiritual disciplines - whether that is on Sunday mornings, or whenever. I've actually been working up a post on that topic for awhile now.
Anyway, thanks for the feedback.
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