Saturday, July 29, 2017

I suppose it's ironic

So I'm sitting here on a Friday afternoon at work as I type this. It has been a slooooow day. Actually, it's been a pretty slow and uneventful week (well, other than the quitting my job part). It dawned on me - isn't that just how it goes?

May and June were two of my three busiest months since I started working here in January 2014. I rented more units than any other facility in those two months, and way more than I usually do, plus I was dealing with the kiosk install, a totally different way of doing rentals, and the added responsibility of taking over locksmith duties (drilling out locks and changing latches suitable for the kiosk). Add in the scorching heat during that time, and I can see where the previous two months really had me reeling. I was overwhelmed. And this doesn't even include any of the drama my superiors like to stir into the mix. I honestly think that played a part in me blowing my top and both walking out of work one day, as well as turning in my resignation.

The irony is - since I turned in my resignation it has been pretty smooth sailing. This is when I actually LIKE this job. It's not totally dead, but I'm also not running around like a chicken with my head cut off all day long and totally wiped out at night.

I'm now beginning to have less regret about quitting though. One of the owners was in my office yesterday, and he didn't say a word about me quitting. Just went about his business like nothing had happened. I didn't say anything either. With the exception of maybe one person, this isn't personal. It's just how business works. And... it's all the more reason I don't want to participate in this sort of life. I know I can be a bit of an idealist, but I think things can and should be different. I feel fortunate that I am financially able (at least for a while) to step back and reassess not only my future, but my present as well.

I am reminded of the phrase I've heard often though I do not know it's origin: "Another world is possible" (or 'another way is possible'). I'm going to need to remind myself of that. Often. I was really, really depressed yesterday. I probably will be again. Each day I keep my head above water is a win though. Right?