Sometimes ya gotta

Everything is heavy anymore. Can you even remember the last time you laughed... and it wasn't to keep from crying!? Yeah, me neither.

Sometimes just showing up is the best we can do. And it has to be enough. Right? Right?!?

Yeesh. A global pandemic that's getting more out of control by the day (and, yes, morons, it is GLOBAL, not just a scheme to make trump look bad), wildfires, hurricanes, no concerts, the sports world is upside down, the economy is just plain down, racial unrest, civil unrest, oh... and there's politics and an election!!

I don't know what I will do if the moron in the white house manipulates his way into another four years. Seriously. I don't know. I can't take it anymore. I can't take another reality TV soap opera episode every single day; the regular dose of publicity stunts to raise ratings and rile up the rest of us. "Look at me! Look at me!" That's all he ever does!!! He's a middle-school-president. A psycho; clown; child... you name it.

 And... we all know he's going to win. I totally believe it's rigged by the republicans. There is no hope.

I'm a little worried about what's going to happen AFTER the election. I hear rumors of a national strike, civil war, breakdown of the electrical grid... who knows?! Some are stocking up on groceries and other staples in anticipation of mass chaos. I hope they're wrong but... with this president and administration, I wouldn't be surprised by anything. 

I guess until then I will just keep showing up for my low-wage, no-value worthless job wondering when they're going to close the doors. Which is what I'm expecting. No one within the organization wants this place to be here. My branch is so different from the others that no one knows what to do with us. And no one cares what I think even though I am here more than anyone else! And now... we were told Friday to stop doing our afternoon deep-clean like every other facility is still doing. You know, just as the country is setting records for positive tests and hospitals are filling up... lets stop cleaning as much! WTF?!? I think the top dogs actually WANT there to be an outbreak at my branch so they can just close us down and not have to deal with us! That's real motivating, let me tell ya...

I would like to care. I want to. I've tried to. I just can't anymore.

So, I'm doing my best to show up each day. While I can. Everything sucks. I'm so tired of it. Bla

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“Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.” -Psalm 51:12