Thursday, April 11, 2024

Filling up on gaslighting

Gaslighting. It was Merriam-Webster's "Word of the Year" in 2022. All the cool kids are talking about it (or at least they were).

This article 35 Gaslighting Phrases That Experts Say Are Unfairly Belittling Your Emotions is... really terrible, I thought. But there were a few things that did make me stop and think.

For starters, the simplest definition of the term gaslighting. Webster defines it as the act or practice of grossly misleading someone especially for one’s own advantage.

However, reading through their list it seems almost everything COULD be legitimate, but could also be construed as gaslighting. And I almost began to feel like it's gaslighting if a man is doing it to a woman, but never the other way around. That's probably me gaslighting though...

Which, I have to admit, whenever I read about things like this, or narcissism, or several other negative character traits... why do I always feel conspicuously guilty? Is it because I am? I mean, I start to suspect that, and then it makes me just want to crawl in a hole. 

But the other thing that jumped out at me while reading this was the list of signs you're being gaslighted (gaslit?):

  • Doubt your feelings, beliefs, thoughts and reality
  • Question your perceptions and judgment
  • Feel alone, powerless, or inadequate
  • Feel confused
  • Apologize frequently
  • Second guess your feelings, memories and decisions
  • Worry that you’re too sensitive or that something's wrong with you
  • Have trouble making decisions
  • Think others dislike you without cause

I mean... THAT'S ME! That's how I feel almost all the time! But then I wonder if that's how people perceive me, or is it 'just me'? Which then makes me wonder if I am the gaslight-er again...

God it's tough having a conversation with myself. 

I guess the point is, don't gaslight people; don't be a man; don't be in a position of authority; and go the hell away! Is that grossly misunderstanding the article well enough? Or grossly misleading you about what it says?

Gah!

I'm going for a run...

https://getpocket.com/explore/item/35-gaslighting-phrases-that-experts-say-are-unfairly-belittling-your-emotions?utm_source=pocket-newtab-en-us 

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