After speaking

I've shared this piece from Bruce Thielemann a number of times in this space. I still find it to be true:

The pulpit calls those anointed to it as the sea calls its sailors. And like the sea it batters and bruises and does not rest. To preach, to really preach, is to die naked a little at a time, and to know each time you do it that you are going to have to do it again.

I did give the message during our church's Sunday service this past week (I don't think they like to call it preaching). At any rate, here are some "post-speaking" thoughts...

• This was maybe the most comfortable I've ever been for a message. Part of it is because our church community is very easy to speak among. People are attentive and at ease. It has a good vibe. Plus, I can wear whatever I want (I wore jeans, long-sleeve black henley shirt, and my 'everyday' running shoes).
• I pretty much stayed with my manuscript, but probably veered from it a bit more than I'd have liked. I purposely wrote it short, knowing I would likely add on-the-spot. It ended up about 25 minutes, which is short for us, but about what I was hoping for.
• I made a couple references to things like "Make America Great Again," and another maga phrase... and while I would say an overwhelming majority of our people are in full support (not of maga, but of anti-maga sentiment), I wish I hadn't even touched on it. I don't think I need to say it anymore. Not that anyone said anything or reacted negatively, but it just didn't feel good.
• I 'felt' really good while speaking - even right before and right after. And that makes me nervous. I really have to push the positive self-talk to get my confidence up... but sometimes it starts to feel a little too close to arrogance.
• It's really difficult for me to slow the adrenaline down after it's over. I'm pumped up. It's the same when I tend bar. I can't just come home and go to sleep. My insides have been whirling a million miles an hour. It doesn't just quiet down easily.
• Once it does quiet down though... that's when the doubt and bad thoughts try to steal their way into my head. I can really get down on myself afterwards. I feel like I have made progress recently - especially this time - but I don't know that I want to do this too often yet again. It puts my mind and body through the ringer.
• I've never been officially diagnosed as bipolar, but it almost feels like that sometimes. I get really high during the message, and can then go to the opposite extreme of low after.
• I think it's good that I have another message I need to start working on for the middle of next month. But that's about as quick of a turnaround as I would like.
• All told... I felt good yesterday. I don't know if I was happy about everything I said (I can't really even remember everything I said), but I've honestly been doing a pretty good job of not thinking about it too much since then.
• There should be video sometime this week... The video link is here, if you're interested... but I NEVER watch myself on video. Just can't do it. I know some people say you should, but... I really have no desire to get "better." I'd rather it not be good or bad because of me. It just is what it is. At least that's what I'm shooting for now. Btw, I looked back, and the last time I spoke was July of 2025.
  

So, there ya go. Just some random thoughts. Yes, I once again "got naked" in front of a group of people. I can't say that I like it any better than I ever have, but I feel like I can at least do it again.