Does it bother you?

Mark 14:66-72 shares the account of Peter denying Jesus. Basically we deny Jesus every time we sin... we're denying the Lordship of Christ in our lives. And when Peter realizes what he's done - when the rooster crows the second time - it says, "...he broke down and wept."

Does it bother you when you sin? Sometimes it bothers me when I do, but I have to admit... sometimes it doesn't. You know, God-will-forgive-me; everybody does it; I'm just human, an' all that.

I don't think it's something that we should continually dwell on, and we shouldn't just mope around our whole lives feeling defeated... but I think our sin should bother us more. It should bother us to the point of confession. If I did something that really offended my wife, or a good friend, I would think it would bother me. I would probably want to get things right in good time. Perhaps our lack of confession, or being bothered by sin, says something about the relationship - or lack of one - we have with Christ. If I offend someone I hardly know it doesn't concern me near as much as offending someone I know well.

One of my favorite true stories is shared by Donald Miller in 'Blue Like Jazz.' Here it is from p.233:

A guy I know named Alan went around the country asking ministry leaders questions. He went to successful churches and asked the pastors what they were doing, why what they were doing was working. It sounded very boring except for one visit he made to a man named Bill Bright, the president of a big ministry. Alan said he was a big man, full of life, who listened without shifting his eyes (cool phrase, I think). Alan asked a few questions. I don't know what they were, but as a final question he asked Dr. Bright what Jesus meant to him. Alan said Dr. Bright could not answer the question. He said Dr. Bright just started to cry. He sat there in his big chair behind his big desk and wept.

When Alan told that story I wondered what it was like to love Jesus that way. I wondered, quite honestly, if that Bill Bright guy was just nuts or if he really knew Jesus in a personal way, so well that he would cry at the very mention of His name. I knew then that I would like to know Jesus like that, with my heart, not just my head. I felt like that would be the key to something.

The key to something, indeed. I want to know You like that too, Jesus.

"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." 1 John 1:9