Jesus' prayer on halloween

Well, we had no trick-or-treaters. And we actually remembered to buy candy this year. That means we can eat what's left of the mini three musketeers and snickers (yippee). We did have our Wednesday night BS group. Tonight we looked at Jesus' prayer in John 17. Dr. Gary Burge was our video teacher, and we had a really good discussion - even with just the 8 of us.

I used to have a very dualistic concept of things. I believe that's the term. I thought there were two sides: 'Christian' or 'other.' When our kids were younger, and after we had become Christians, we didn't take them trick-or-treating or let them dress up for halloween. We didn't want them participating in the "devil's holiday." I am still very guarded and aware of the influence of evil in our world.... But I've come to believe that things are not all or nothing. There isn't a "good" and an "evil." There is us and God. And God can use many of those people/things I used to see as only evil. Just like those I used to believe to be wholly good can also do bad. In all of it though - God is sovereign; and he asks us to love everyone, no matter how much in them is good or bad. Because we're all the same aside from him.

I love John 17. It is a beautiful prayer. You can click the link to read the whole thing, but here is a snippet from verses 22-23:

I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one: I in them and you in me. May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.

We talked about the fact that there is so little unity in the North American church, but in places where Christians have had to face persecution it seems to grow; and Christianity seems to grow. One could think that what we need in America is more persecution. Or.... we need to work at love and unity all that much more.

I dunno. We didn't have a big party for the neighborhood kids, we didn't do anything fun, but it was a really nice time for me thinking about Jesus praying for us all those years ago. Pretty wild - that he prayed for you and me. Hmm.

Peace out; peace in.

10 - 20 - 30 years ago

Grace tagged me with the 10-20-30 meme. I'm supposed to remember what I was doing 10, 20, and 30 years ago. That will be a chore for an old head like me, but here goes...

1997
I was living in Findlay, Ohio attending Winebrenner Theological Seminary. Jane was cleaning houses to support us, and I worked a little delivering office furniture. We had moved from a fairly large house in Illinois with two garages into an apartment complex. It wasn't so bad though, as the kids seemed to enjoy their time in Findlay. Carrie went through 6th, 7th, and 8th grades, and Isaac did 3rd, 4th, and 5th. Interestingly enough, now that Carrie has graduated college, she moved back to Findlay and is presently working at Winebrenner. :) It was the first place any of us had lived outside of our original hometown.

1987
Um, let's see.... I believe this is when I changed careers from being a gas station attendant, restaurant cashier, and videographer's gopher to working in the local chimney factory as a sheet metal worker. I still remember my first paycheck at the factory - I had more taken out in taxes than my whole checks had been at the other jobs. Carrie was 2 years old and Jane had just found out she was pregnant with Isaac. We had also lost a child in between. This was probably the longest that my hair had ever been. We lived in a teeny two-bedroom, one-bath house in the southwest corner of Buda, IL (population: 500). I had always dreamed of living in this house. We had an acre of pasture, several out-buildings, and no neighbors on two sides. It was a great place with an awesome view of the countryside, but just not a real big house. I was not a Christian at the time and spent Sunday mornings likely sleeping late and watching Grizzly Adams with a hangover. These were not some of the better years of our marriage.

1977
Foggier. I was a freshman in high school. And my dad was the high school principal. Life for me was ....difficult.... at this time. I went to a really small school. I think there were 62 in my class this year, but only 43 of us graduated (or something like that). I went out for football, basketball, and track; and was fairly well liked I guess. But I was pretty shy to begin with, and it was just no fun. I felt like people were either out to get me, wanted to use me, or felt sorry for me; so it was at this time that I began some rather destructive habits in an attempt to deal with life. My sister had just graduated and moved to college, so I had the choice of rooms in the upstairs. I think I remember listening to Kiss, Alice Cooper, Black Sabbath, Santana, and the like - as loud as I possibly could. I don't remember too much else.

Whew, I'm glad that's over. Traveling through time can be a draining experience. As is my custom with these things, I now tag.... YOU (or anybody that wants to be 'it').

Fort Wayne mayoral race with Hendrix

I heard a guy on the radio talking about the two mayoral candidates from Fort Wayne. I can't vote, because I am outside the city limits, but if I could.... I think I'd vote for Tom Henry. Why? Well, apparently the radio guy interviewed Tom and his opponent, Matt Kelty. He asked what kind of music they grew up listening to. Kelty said he remembered Rush, because his college roommate had 11 of their albums. Tom said he was more of a Jimi Hendrix 'Are You Experienced' guy. Hendrix has it for me hands down. Plus the announcer said Tom is often back stage at many concerts at the Coliseum, but that Kelty says he has never been to a rock concert there. So if I were able to vote, Tom would get mine. But don't go basing your vote on my opinion, because that's about the extent of my politicalness - who listens to what kind of music. I couldn't tell you what party these guys are in, and I didn't even vote in the last election, and my church was the polling place.

You know, I would really hate to be a politician. I mean, I think it is a very honorable thing. I imagine most of them really want to do good, and help people, and society and whatnot. But I bet it's almost impossible to not have to compromise your principles at some point. I mean, any job that requires you to work with people is going to require compromise. So you've really got to know what's important to you. And you've got to be able to take two steps back in order to take one forward on so many fronts. Plus all the second-guessing, and public opinion, and stress, and all. Certainly these people need loads of prayer. Maybe that can be my contribution to politics - regardless of who wins.

And speaking of 'Are You Experienced.' I can still remember the first time I heard the album. It was probably 1978 or 79, I think I was a sophomore in high school. Me and a friend rode in his Volkswagon station wagon to Sterling, IL and back where I bought my first (and only) nice stereo. I got a receiver, cassette deck, turntable, and speakers. And we cranked Hendrix's first album (probably 8-track) all the way there and back. I eventually bought the vinyl. Ah, the memories.

New mouse and license

MOUSE
Last night I finally decided to splurge and get a new mouse for my laptop. It's the only computer I use at work, and I've had an old, old cheapy mouse that I used to use until it decided it would only move to the right but not the left. That's not handy. I've been using the little pad, but I stopped at Best Buy and bought a Microsoft Wireless Notebook Optical 3000. Yessss. It is nice having a mouse again. And it's pretty slick too.

DRIVERS LICENSE
This morning I ran to town and got a new drivers license (actually, I drove). I didn't even know mine was about to expire until I applied for my passport a few weeks ago. I'm glad the clerk told me or I never would have thought about it. At any rate, for those of you in the Fort Wayne area, I went to the new Wayndale branch. Wow... I walked right in and someone helped me immediately. I bet I wasn't there ten minutes, and five minutes was spent waiting on my picture to develop. And I have to admit.... I passed the eye exam (apparently), but when I first looked at line five.... man, I could hardly make it out at all. I guess I guessed good. I was a bit surprised at the price. I was expecting it to be $21, but it was $34.50. I don't remember having to pay extra for a motorcycle endorsement. I don't really even need the motorcycle license - I don't currently have a motorcycle - but I hate to get rid of it, because as the laws stand now I wouldn't be required to wear a helmet if I did get a bike, but if I had to get a new license I would need a helmet. I only wore a helmet one time when I had a bike, and that was because there was a torrential downpour. Also, my new license is still horizontal. I thought it was going to be vertical. I guess it must depend on your age. At least now I don't have to get it renewed again until 2012.

CELL PHONE
On the way home I got a call on my cell phone. It was a wrong number. They wanted to know if my truck was still for sale. I should have said yes. Anyway, it always startles me when my phone rings, because only like 5 people in the whole world know my number. I just don't like being at everyone's beck and call at any and all times. Maybe I should be, but..... I dunno. I'm just not a phone guy. Send me an email instead.

A vocation for each of us

From Scot McKnight's book 'Jesus Creed' (p.84):

Our vocation is to be what God made us to be, as many have learned only after considerable struggle. Parker Palmer, after decades of wrestling to please others, came to a shady oasis when he absorbed some Quaker wisdom on vocation: "Let your life speak." His spark of insight: "Before you tell your life what you intend to do with it, listen for what it intends to do with you."

What Palmer is asking us to learn is this: God will not ask us, "Were you (like) Mother Theresa or the prophet Daniel or Peter or your father or mother?" Instead, God will ask us, "Were you the 'you' I made you to be?" Os Guinness echoes this wisdom: "The truth is not that God is finding us a place for our gifts but that God has created us and our gifts for a place of his choosing - and we will only be ourselves when we are finally there."

You are to be who God meant you to be, as the wise of the Church have always known. One who learned this lesson so well is the mother of Jesus, Mary, who also pulls her story up to the table of Jesus. It is the story of her past being swallowed up in the goodness of God.

Scot does a good job pointing out that vocation isn't just how one goes about being a Christian, and it's not just our job. He says it is "the special assignment that only you can do". That might include your occupation, or it might be your specific role as a parent, or how you fit into your particular work environment, or social circle, or..... whatever. It's you being you.

Cool. So.... be you!

Just thinking...

Sometimes there are so many things running through the head that it's hard to concentrate on any one thing. The result is to either post nothing.... or just babble. Guess what?

• Yesterday morning I got to the church building at the usual 6 am and the furnace wasn't working. This was the first time we've had to use it this season, and it had been running on Saturday, so I knew it was likely a circuit breaker or something. After checking around and looking at several breaker boxes and fuse boxes - not discovering anything wrong - I took off the furnace cover to see if there was a reset button or something. On a whim I pressed the door sensor and.... presto: we had ignition. Apparently the furnace door had jiggled loose or something. I duct taped it shut just to be on the safe side.
• I bought a new office chair Friday. It is nice compared to my old one. I hadn't noticed just how bent and void of padding the old one was. I picked out a black leather (likely fake leather), but when I opened the box it was brown. I actually like the brown better. And.... it was already on sale - from $139 down to $79 - plus I had a 20% off coupon. So it was only like $65 dollars.
• The lovely lady and I attended our first halloween party in about 25 years on Saturday. The infamous MR invited us, and it was great fun meeting some new people. I met MDH for the first time. He has commented on here before, and he didn't look at all like what I expected. Nice guy (who had a tire track across the front of him and a knot on the head - I guess he was an accident victim. At first I wasn't sure if it was a costume or if he'd just had a bad day). Also got to meet Rachel's hubby. Rachel has commented here, and her husband wins my award as 'best costume.' He came dressed as a woman, and was hilarious. Jane and I both thought he reminded us of a former co-worker, and one of my better friends, from when we lived in Illinois. Jane and I were, as usual, a couple. She dressed as a cat, and I as a burglar (cat burglar). Mine was pretty lame though. Basically just some old overalls from a gas station with a stocking hat. MR's dog is very cool. I wish I'd have brought my camera (for costumes and dog pics). I also thought it was neat to be invited into this circle of friends. Most of the people there met in a sort of internet chat room BEFORE there was an internet. I think that's wild. At any rate, we had to leave early but still had a good time, and it was nice to be invited to a party again.
• I am feeling much better now. I still have an occasional ache or pain, but that's probably normal. Must have just been a random bug in my system.
• We had a free preview of showtime on our basic cable (dish, actually), and after viewing the selections for a few days I am wondering why in the world anyone would ever pay for it. I don't think there was a single movie I wanted to watch the whole time. And not only that, but there were some TERRIBLE movies on (as in 'bad acting; poorly written; downright stupid').

Well, I suppose I should get the day going. It's nice to actually be awake when I'm awake. Time to nestle into the new chair and catch up on Scot McKnight's 'Jesus Creed.'

Peace out; peace in.

Trot trot to boston...

As I sit sleepy-eyed in the cornfields of Indiana, son Isaac is in Boston today for the Apartheid Paradigm in Palestine-Israel: Issues of Justice and Equality conference. I don't really know what it's all about, but I know Desmond Tutu is speaking, and they're expecting a little tension and possible conflict. I'm hoping that it's a fruitful time, but also praying for everyone's safety. There's an article in the Boston Globe about it HERE.

Peace is something everyone needs. Whether it's in the hearts of hoosiers, or on a grander scale involving countries and people-groups. Certainly there are differing opinions on the best way to bring it about, but I have never understood those who are opposed to "peace" people.

And on a totally unrelated note: apparently there are different nursery rhymes that start out "Trot, trot to Boston..." Jane always used to sing one to our kids that went:

Trot, trot to Boston
to buy a fat pig.
Home again, home again,
Jiggetyyyyyyy...... jig!

She would do it with the child perched on her foot (of the leg which was crossed over the other one), bouncing during the first three lines, then on the "jiggety" she would raise them up high........ and drop them down on the "jig." It always brought a laugh and a smile.

Sick day

I took yesterday afternoon off and slept. I don't know what I have, but I am tired as a dog, and I just feel... cruddy. I've felt like this in varying degrees since last Thursday night. Just when I think I'm feeling better, then I start to feel worse again. I seem to have a history of this sort of thing about this time of year. Not every year, but enough to remember. Seems it's usually attributed to "some kinda virus" or something. Yesterday when sleeping I felt like my arms each weighed a ton, and that they weren't a part of my body. That was weird. But then I got up and went to the B.S. group and didn't feel too bad. I dunno.

#1 song on this day

Do you know what song was #1 on the Billboard charts on the day you were born? If not, you can go to THIS SITE and find out (you can actually find out the #1 song for ANY date). The top song on November 2, 1962 (my birth date) was: "He's A Rebel" by The Crystals. Go figure.

What was the #1 song on your birth date?

ht - marko

Doing what Jesus did

Whoa, I saw this quote from Rebecca Manley Pippert in a comment left on another blog by Bob Smallwood. Needed to put it down to remember it.

Jesus always seemed to be doing two things: asking questions and telling stories. Christians always seem to be doing two other things: giving answers and “preaching.”

All four are necessary — at the right time and in the right place. But we tend to forget that the God of the Bible was an extraordinary communicator; we ignore Jesus’ example of how to start conversation, and we jump in prematurely with answers and sermonettes before the listener’s curiosity is aroused.

Quote by Rebecca Manley Pippert, “Fresh Air Evangelism Training,” The Magnetic Fellowship, Larry K. Weeden, ed. Waco: Word Books, 1988 (Leadership Library XV), p. 63.

I'm not posting this as a criticism of other Christians. God knows there's enough people doing that in the blogosphere already. But it's something that hits home with me. I am TERRIBLE at telling stories, and usually don't think to ask questions of others. This is a reminder to ME. This is something I want/need to work on. It is also necessary - because of my occupation - to have answers and to preach, but it's important for me personally to learn to tell more stories and ask more questions. If Jesus did it, then yeah... it only makes sense.

emerging church thoughts

Rick McKinley has a great post 'My Thoughts on the Emerging Church.' This is one of the better, more balanced things I've read about it in quite some time. (Isn't this Donald Miller's pastor?) He starts out...

Then the questions move to what the Emerging church believes about this or that. To which I reply the same things Baptists believe about it.

They scratch their head, think about what I have said and then ask, Which Baptist?

To which I reply, “exactly”.

It's not a long post, so click through and read the whole thing.

h/t - grace

Guest speaker - no handouts

Yesterday I had the privilege of having Lance Finley come and share with our group. Lance has preached in my absence more than any other single person, and I always appreciate his willingness to do so because I don't trust just anyone to come and teach/preach in my church; but I trust Lance, and it was nice yesterday that I actually got to be here too. Lance is our denominational director of youth and family ministry; a former Illini like myself; and one of those people that - I don't even remember how we met, but I've always liked him. Perhaps it's the weird sense of humor. :) At any rate, I know he often reads here, and I don't want to give him a big head, but he preached a fine sermon from Luke 2:41-52 and challenged me (and everyone else) to be about our Father's business. It was also great chatting with him over lunch and hearing his views and insights into other things. Perhaps the thing I have always liked best about Lance is... he is as wise and learned as they come, but he never makes you feel stupid. A completely humble, rock-solid dude. My only regret was that I forgot to bring my camera yesterday. I wanted to get a pic of him preaching. Dernit.

The bad part about yesterday was a blurred memory of a conversation right before the worship gathering started. It was about 2 minutes before we were supposed to start and I saw her pull in the parking lot. There is this woman that has been stopping at the church and at my house for some time now. She always gives me a story about how she needs money for this or that, and that she's going to start coming to church, and this and that. I really feel bad for the woman; I don't doubt that her life is hard; and I always give her $20 or $40 dollars or something, and I pray with her. I think she has also started stopping at neighbors houses when I'm not around too. Well, she comes in yesterday right before we're ready to start and asks if we can talk. I told her I couldn't at the moment. She proceeded to give me her story again anyway (like she's never talked to me before). So I sat down beside her and just told her that I had given her plenty of money, and that she was welcome to stay for church, but that I just couldn't give her anymore. She said she wanted to stay, but that she really needed money and could I just ask the congregation if they would help. I told her "no" I wasn't going to do that today (we have done that on different occasions). She started tearing up and asked if she could take some cookies and juice with her. She must have left right after that.

Yeah, I was torn. Part of my brain went to the story of the good samaritan - and I was too busy doing religious work to be able to help someone in need. But the other part of me wondered if I had been wrong to just hand her money on all those other occasions. I mean, this woman has a house, a car, and it appears all the essentials she needs. What she really needs is a relationship with a church - which I've tried to tell her. She's not destitute, she's just a moocher. And I was tired of being a part of that. What's weird is... once I got up, I didn't even think about her again until I was leaving church to go to lunch. I wonder what that says about me?

I dunno. I go back and forth on how best to help people who are asking for money. I don't know that there is one single answer that covers every situation. Sometimes I just give it with no questions asked, but other times I don't think that is in their best interest. What most people need isn't money, they need to know how to live. And the best way to learn how to live is to get to know Jesus (IMO). I should probably feel worse about not helping people do that than about not giving handouts of money.

Marching band day

Today we drove down to Indianapolis for the Indiana Marching Band State Finals. We met Isaac there, and later hooked up with his girlfriend Laura. She was in Indy competing on the Xavier University rowing team (we also had a nice lunch with Isaac's good friends Caleb and Andrew - two super guys). This is a picture of Norwell performing (where Isaac went to high school). They finished fourth today. The former drummer for our church (Aaron) - who is also the drummer in Isaac's bands: hiroshima mon amour, the jefferson hunt, and sundays off - wrote most of the percussion and directed the drummers. Pretty darn amazing for a 19-year-old. You can barely make him out in the light blue shirt on the sidelines. He has a really cool mohawk.

Jane and I had never even heard of marching band competitions until Isaac started high school. It is pretty intense. Isaac played trombone (freshman), baritone (sophomore), tuba (junior), and he was drum major his senior year. They won state his freshman and senior years, and got third the other two. It was always quite fun being at the state finals at the RCA Dome. There's nothing quite like getting to see your son with his name in lights on the same big screens as Peyton Manning. This year was a little more relaxed since he was sitting beside us. :)

It was also a beautiful midwest fall day for a drive. The leaves are turning nicely.

Trip to findlay

Last night Jane and I had no plans so we decided to drive over to Findlay, Ohio and see our favorite daughter, Carrie Jade. It's only about an hour and a half, and I hadn't been there since helping her move in in July.

We had a nice trip, and good visit. Took a book shelf and a little table to put by her door. Then we headed to Tony's, where I almost had a Ben Roethlisberger Burger - a one pound hamburger for $7 (You know, he's #7 for the Pittsburgh Steelers). Big Ben is from Findlay, and his uncle was actually Carrie's sunday school teacher when we lived there during her middle school years. Anyway, I had a tenderloin and salad instead. For some reason I've not felt well since though. I don't know if it was something I got off the salad bar or what. I hardly slept last night; got all sweaty, then cold; and I still feel real sluggish today. Maybe it's the weather. Sounds like a good day to do nothing.

I did plan to go to the coliseum and get tickets for John Mellencamp sometime today. Not that we really wanted to seem him (or wanted to spend that much money to see him), but we had been trying to find a concert to attend for my birthday, and there just isn't a lot going on right now with anybody we'd like to see. JM is playing Fort Wayne the night before my birthday, so.... what the heck. Actually, John's guitarist used to be in my friends band (Jason & the Scorchers). His name is Andy York. We sat just behind him for supper the last time we were in Nashville. He's a dern good guitarist, and really swell guy, but he's actually even smaller than I am!

Well..... authority always wins.

Peace out; peace in.

The kind of pastor I would like to be

Isaiah 61:1 (contemporary english version):

The Lord, has chosen and sent me
to tell the oppressed the good news,
to heal the brokenhearted,
and to announce freedom for prisoners and captives.

Church signs

Is this your church? (ht -Mon. Morn. Insight)

Today

I had a frustrating conversation. Several phone messages in varying degrees of need. A few moments of indecision. A big lump in my throat. I walked into a hospital room to an old woman crying. I sat on the edge of the bed for a long time. Lunch in the car. Listened to the cleaning lady. Applied for my very first passport. Went back to the hospital. Supper at Taco Bell. A nice Bible study on the Lord's Prayer with a few others. I wonder.

Hallowed be Thy name.

blue jeans

I used to not wear blue jeans too often, because... you know... everybody wore them. So I had a lot of corduroys. I don't care so much anymore, and now wear them regularly.

Sometimes music just sounds stupid too. I mean, I never listen to it in my office, but sometimes I'll pick up the guitar and play a 'g' and... I'll just hang 'er back up on the wall. Or if I'm in the car, I may turn on the radio and... I dunno, sometimes it just sounds stupid. Like, what point does it serve.

But then there are other times.

I heard Blue Jean Blues today - off ZZ Tops' "Fandango" album. This is not one of my favorite of their albums, but it is one of my all-time favorite songs. It's one of those that shouldn't be covered by anyone else. Maybe shouldn't even be done live. It's one of *those* songs. I've always had a thing for simple songs, especially the blues, but this one takes my mind back to another era. I worked many a day in a gas station, and always looked forward to coming home to my very favorite blue-jean girl. Even when I didn't wear them, she has ALWAYS looked good in a pair of faded blues. And still does. = )

Listen to Blue Jean Blues here.

More Andrea poems

Andrea has a couple more gems:

Positioning moment
what position
do you assume
when
face to face
with a serpent
in your own garden

Choice moment
we have nothing to offer God
except our choice to be with Him
and that is a choice
that no one but Him
is likely to put any value on

Bummer

Jane found out today she didn't get the job she interviewed for last week. It was one of those where they practically told her it was hers during the interview, but... They left a message on the answering machine.

If you're the praying type - she could sure use a different job. Making pizzas five days a week and working in food service in general is something you can only do for so long.

...sigh...

Dancing with a piano (and other moving notes)

Saturday we had the piano tuned. It was long overdue. They should probably be tuned yearly, and definitely after a move. So we called the guy that tunes the church's piano. I love listening to him do it. It's about an hour of note-note-note; then two notes together; then a chord... over and over and over again, up and down the keyboard. I find the repetition extremely soothing. It slows me down or something. Anyhew... What should have been a 45-minute job turned into a 3 hour job, and he needs to come back because he broke 3 strings. He said one of the bridge bars (or something) appears to have been improperly installed. Nothing that can't be dealt with, but a real bugger for what he thought was going to be a Saturday morning quickie.

At any rate, I learned some useful information about moving pianos (and how to treat them in general). I asked if it was okay to set an upright like ours on its back when moving it. He said, "Oh yes, that is the best and safest way to move a piano - especially when hauling one in a truck." I then shared how we had actually set this one up on end to get it in and out of one of our houses, and he said something like, "Oh, they love to be tossed around like that." And that's when I first noticed that he was talking about them as though they were alive. I suppose in a way only a professional tuner/repairman could. Then I could see it in his eyes and the expression on his face ...He wasn't here just to fix an instrument or piece of furniture... this guy was here to give her some lovin'. He wasn't doing a job, he was redeeming this beauty; he was restoring her self-esteem; he wanted to see her get up and dance again!!!

I love people like that. They are full of life, and they're not content to just live it, they want to share it! They want to see others come to life too. I wish I could be more like the piano tuner... taking the world dancing (though Jane will tell you it's a chore to get me on the dance floor. Clapton's 'Beautiful Tonight', and not much else. I'm speaking metaphorically here). :)

I think that's what I liked so much about when my son and his friends used to buy pizza's and eat with the homeless of downtown Indianapolis. It wasn't that they were really doing anything *for* them. But they were doing something WITH them. Dancing, so-to-speak. [Hmm. I always forget to ask why they stopped. Maybe it's because I have an inkling.]

So... now that I hear the music...

family pictures

These aren't the *official* family pics, but the one's that were taken on my cheapo camera.The lovely lady Jane and me.

Carrie and Isaac

Isaac and "friend" Laura (who was kind enough to take the other pics).

Fish fry today

Tonight we have our annual fish fry. We probably serve around 350-450 meals of all-you-can-eat fish and/or tenderloin, potatoes, beans, slaw, dessert and drink. It's $7 for adults; $5 for kids 6-12; and free for those 5 and under. Any money we make goes to the Fort Wayne Rescue Mission. You can eat inside, outside, or get it to go.

It always seems like a whole lotta work for not much money to me. But people seem to want to keep doing it. So I just stay the heck outta the way and let 'em have at it.

If you live in the area - stop on by between 4:30 and 7 pm. It's good food, and for a good cause. The lovely lady and I will be taking money at the door from 4-5:30 (people start showing up about 3:30). Please say "hi" if you read it here (no prize, but I'd like to meet ya).

Consumer church vs. missional church

Just looking through my notes from the 'Emerging Churches' workshop with Eddie Gibbs yesterday. There is quite a bit of stuff even in the limited number of notes I took (thankfully he gave us all his powerpoint slides so we didn't have to write everything down).

One thing he stressed about the emerging church is the desire to move from being consumer-driven to being missional (carrying out the mission of Jesus in the world). He says roughly 2% of people in the church are paid staff, and 18% are volunteer leaders. In the consumer church that means 20% of the people are expected to spend their time trying to keep the other 80% happy.

But in the missional church - the 20% should be spending their time training and equipping the 80% in learning to live like Jesus, therefore carrying out his mission in the world. He says we should never "dismiss" a congregation, but we should "disperse it" at the end of a service.

He says a 'Missional Community' ... "Consists of followers of Jesus who are seeking together to be faithful in their place and time."

He referred to the book 'The Starfish and the Spider: The Unstoppable Power of Leaderless Organizations' (by Ori Brafman and Rod Beckstrom). To kill (or stop) a spider, all one must do is step on it. But with a starfish - if you cut off a leg (are they called legs?), it will eventually grow back. So that doesn't work. The correlation is... we often try to bring about change (eliminate an unwanted enemy perhaps) by trying to stomp it out - only to see it resurface later. What Jesus was trying to teach us is how to conquer evil not by crushing it, but by changing the environment in which it lives (that's how starfish are removed). Hmm... you could apply this to a lot of things...

10 little expenses that add up fast

I saw THIS ARTICLE and thought it was kinda innaresting. Stuff we don't always think about. Here's the bulk of it:

Do you wonder where your money goes, especially if you're not a big spender? It's surprisingly easy to blow thousands, a few dollars at a time.

It's easy to fritter away money on little daily expenses. If you fall into these money traps, learn to avoid them and pocket the savings.

Coffee: According to the National Coffee Association, the average price for a cup of brewed coffee is $1.38. There are roughly 260 weekdays per year, so buying one coffee every weekday morning costs almost $360 per year.

Cigarettes: The Campaign for Tobacco-Free Kids reports that the average price for a pack of cigarettes in the United States is $4.54. Pack-a-day smokers fork out $1,650 a year. Weekend smoker? Buying a pack once a week adds up, too: $236.

Alcohol: Drink prices vary based on the location. But assuming an average of $5 per beer including tip, buying two beers per day adds up to $3,650 per year. Figure twice that for two mixed drinks a day at the local bar. That's not chump change.

Bottled water from convenience stores: A 20-ounce bottle of Aquafina bottled water costs about $1. One bottle of water per day costs $365 per year. It costs the environment plenty, too.

Weekday lunches out: $9 will generally cover a decent lunch most workdays. If you buy, rather than pack, a lunch five days a week for one year, you shell out about $2,340 a year.

Interest charges on credit card bills: According to a survey released at the end of May, the median amount of credit card debt carried by Americans is $6,600. The average interest rate on a standard card is about 13%. Making the minimum payment each month, it will take 250 months (almost 21 years) to pay off the debt and cost $4,868 in interest. Ouch!

By Bankrate.com

Back up

I am back. On the one hand, I've been gone all day today. I went to a talk by Eddie Gibbs on the emerging church (he wrote the book 'emerging churches'). I didn't sign up for it until late last week, and then I didn't think I was going to be able to attend because of my back. But it felt a little better today and I was able to sit somewhat pain free.

I've had this danged lower back pain for a couple of weeks. What with mowing the yard, driving long distances, carrying boxes, moving furniture and whatnot... it caught up with me. I didn't go to the doctor because I knew he would just say, "You know, you're not as young as you used to be." Yeah... no kidding. So the last couple days have been pretty miserable. Sitting in a chair actually hurt worse than anything. And guess what I do the most? But I haven't lifted anything since we moved our bedroom furniture out on Tuesday and cleaned the carpet in there. We put the mattress in the middle of the living room and slept there the past two nights. Partly because I didn't think I could help move it back, and partly... just because we COULD sleep on the living room floor. Bogie thought it was kinda neat.

I'm a little sore right now. Just got home from sitting in a plastic chair from 9 am to 3:30 pm. But it feels much better than it has the last couple days. I will likely blog about the seminar eventually.

peace.

Everything must change - conventional vs. emerging

Scot McKnight is reviewing Brian McLaren's new book Everything Must Change. Yesterday he went over ch. 10 in which BM compares the "conventional" view of the kingdom of God (meaning low-church, protestant, evangelical) against the "emerging church" view of the kingdom. The post and comments are HERE, but here is the bulk of Scot's post:

In chp 10 McLaren compares the “conventional” and the “emerging” view. Four questions:

1. What is the story we find ourselves in?

Conventional: creation as perfect, fall, determination by God to destroy creation and humans unless they are exempted.
Emerging: creation as good, humans rebel and fill earth — individually and as groups — with evil and injustice, God wants to save humanity but humans are “like sheep without a shepherd” and left to themselves they will “spiral downward in sickness and evil” (80).

2. What questions did Jesus come to answer?

Conventional: How can individuals be saved from eternal punishment?” and “How can God help individuals to be happy until then?”
Emerging: What must be done about the mess we’re in? “Mess” means general human condition and Roman conditions from which Israel wants liberation.

3. How did Jesus respond to the crisis?

Conventional: If you want to be among those who escape eternal punishment, you must repent from your individual sins and believe that my Father punished me on the cross so he won’t have to punish you in hell. This is the good news. (Basic quotation from p. 81)
Emerging: I have been sent with good news — God loves humanity, “even in its lostness and sin.” God invites us to turn and follow a new way. “Trust me and become my disciple, and you will be transformed, and you will participate in the transformation of the world, which is possible, beginning right now” (81).

4. Why is Jesus important?

Conventional: Jesus solves problem of original sin (so they won’t go to hell). “In a sense, Jesus saves these people from God … from the righteous wrath of God which sinful humans deserve…” (81). It’s a gift; personal relationship with God; happier life on earth and more rewards in heaven.
Emerging: Jesus came “to save the earth and all it contains from its ongoing destruction because of human evil. Through his life and teaching, through his suffering, death, and resurrection, he inserted into human history a seed of grace, truth, and hope that can never be defeated. This seed will, against all opposition and odds, prevail over the evil and injustice of humanity and lead to the world’s ongoing transformation into the world God dreams of” (81-2). This is all a “free gift they receive as an expression of God’s grace and love.”

The conventional view leads to these problems:

1. It is mostly a legal solution to a capital infraction against God.
2. Little hope for history (or the future).
3. It is dualistic: spirit vs. body.
4. God offers his blessings only to the elect “and little or nothing (except condemnation) to everyone else” (84).
5. God must destroy the world.
6. The world will get worse and worse until the end.

If you read the comments left on Scot's blog, you will see that many people argue BM's characterization of the conventional view. I understand it has not been everyone's experience, but I have to say, for me personally, it is pretty much right on. I feel very much like John Frye who said:

The “gospel” I inherited was “If you stood before God tonight and he asked you ‘Why should I let you into my heaven?’ what would you say?” Another version of the “gospel” wanted to assure me that I would immediately go to heaven if I died unexpectedly in a car crash, etc.” Let’s admit this: the conventional gospel is horribly reduced. It had nothing to do with being in community, following Jesus, or caring for the world. It was how to be sure you’re getting into heaven. It was all about, “Are you sure Jesus is in your heart?”

I think this is probably why BM's writings have all resonated so deeply with me - and what has drawn me to the emerging view. It's not so much that the evangelical gospel I grew up with was wrong, but it was seriously incomplete. So... I guess I have another book to buy. It will likely go to the top of the pile.

Peace out; peace in.

You can tune a piano...

Here is a picture of our piano. Jane's brother brought it out to us this weekend. Her parents bought it for her when she was in fifth grade. We had it for awhile when we lived in our own home in Buda, but took it back to her mom's when we moved to Ohio. I think it looks rather grand sitting in our living room again. It is likely that it carries memories better than a tune at this point. The birds sitting on top of it had been Jane's grandmother's - that she used to let Jane play with when she was a child. We found them in storage at her mom's house.

I was a bit worried about getting the thing inside our house. I was afraid we might have to tip it on its side - which we did when we moved it before - but we had good help and it was a piece of cake. Some of the young guys from church just picked it up and carried it inside. Whew!

I don't know if you can make it out (maybe if you click on the picture), but on top of the bookshelf to the right is a violin that my great-great-grandfather made (Friedolein Valentine Horwedel). It is a 3/4 violin, but is in excellent shape. If I *could* play it, I'm sure it would sound.... okay. :)

Instruments... they can carry more than just a tune.

Our Sunday worship gathering

Well, the 6 pots of coffee are made, guitar's tuned, everything has been checked, tried, and prayed for... and now I wait and hope someone else shows up.

Our Sunday mornings can look different from time to time (like, today is World Communion Sunday - we don't usually have communion every Sunday). We usually follow the same basic format though. Here is what we're doing this morning:

Welcome & announcements
Read Lamentations 3:19-26
Sing "Lord, I Lift Your Name on High" & "Nothing But the Blood"
Responsive Scripture reading: Romans 8:31-39
Sing "It Is Well With My Soul"
Sharing blessings (tithes, offerings, and praises)
Prayer
Sermon (20-30 min)
Communion (sing "Kum-ba-yah" while elements are passed out. And... I know, we just sang this a couple of weeks ago - but it seemed right for this occasion)
Sing "Amazing Grace" (we have closed with this song for about 2 years straight now - every Sunday)
The Lord's Prayer
Depart listening to Ashley Cleveland singing "Power in the Blood"

Yeah, pretty old-school songs today. Sometimes I just can't do new stuff. It will just be me on acoustic guitar and Jane on keys. The drummer is gone today. Communion will be with grape juice and hawaiian bread.

Me lovely lady is here, so I better get...

Happy Sunday!

What's goin on...

Just lazin' at the end of my week. Thinkin' about stuff that's happenin. What with the emerging world all abuzz with the release of McLaren's new book; people still ranting over Driscoll's comments; and quite the wind blowin' over at the emerging cggc blog.... I'm ignornin it all for the moment. Today I mowed the yard, and we borrowed the neighbors carpet cleaner and have been suckin' up dirt. Fun stuff, lemme tell ya. Also...

• I'm still puzzled as to why the regional office that is over me sent me an email the other day asking me to verify my educational degrees. They said the national office wanted to know. Hmm. It's the same as always. Am I being checked up on? Investigated? Has my dangerous mind finally caught up with me? I dunno. It's a mystery.
  
• Jane signed up for classes the other day, and starts Monday, but is still yet to find out how much it costs. That's just bizarre if you ask me. She won't find out until AFTER classes start.
• She also had a job interview the other day (but don't tell the people she currently works with). I don't know that she'll get it, or would even take it if it was offered, but it's always nice to be made to feel like you're wanted. And she needs to get the heck out of where she's at.
• I think I'm getting stupider. I used to have an occasional intelligent thought... but I dunno... it just doesn't seem to be happenin' anymore.
  
• In less than a month I will be 45 freakin' years old. That's all we need to say about that.
• We're supposed to get Jane's piano from her mom's house this weekend. It's still up in the air. I have yet to line up any muscle to help move it if it does come.
• I seem to be able to piss people off without even trying anymore. Like, every time I open my mouth I offend somebody else. I don't like being like this. It must be my spiritual gift.
  

Well, that's about all I can think of right now. This blog is starting to suck. That would be a good thing if it was a carpet cleaner. Hmm. That's enough about that.

Random. Ya think?

Deeper connections

Last night we started our Wednesday Night B.S. up again. To most people the "B.S." stands for Bible Study, but... you know, it's not ALL about that. At any rate, we are using a dvd series called "Deeper Connections: Connecting Biblical Truths to Everyday Life." There are three different ones, and we're using the one on the "prayers of Jesus."

It's actually pretty good stuff. Personally, I like videos - as long as they're from a reputable place and they use good speakers. These allowed just enough time for some good discussion. I usually wish there were more people at these things, but it's probably actually better with a smaller group. More opportunity for questions and discussion. There were 8 others last night. It lasted an hour and a half.

Small groups are something I really need to make more of a priority. I always forget how positively they impact me when I haven't been involved in one for awhile. I still believe spiritual growth happens best in small groups of people. They truly are a place for... "deeper connections."

Today I am suffering from a stinkin' burned lip though. I headed to the hospital this morning to be with someone going in for a heart cath and took a sip of coffee and burned a big blister right dead center on my upper lip. How in the heck does that happen? Man, it hurt. Probably not as much as a heart procedure, but still...

Rock on. IT IS THURSDAY!!! I love Thursdays, because that means tomorrow is FRIDAY!

Church watchdogs

I am always amazed at some people's ability to so completely miss the point and talk in circles. But then, I forget that a watchdog's sole purpose is to keep people FROM something. To distract, to scare, to manipulate.... Perhaps they have the best of intentions thinking they are protecting something valuable, but it's possible they're just keeping people from what they really need.

Loving challenges for emergent

I still don't know if I am emergent, or emerging, or EV, or anything of the sort. My most-read post continues to be 'Why I Am No Longer Emergent'... even though it was really just a depression-induced whine. Many of the things I used to read and hear from 'emerging' people really resonated with me. But I guess I have always wanted to more-or-less be thought of as just a 'Christian.' People tell me you can't do that though. That there has to be a label. I don't like the definition of most labels, so I guess I've felt more drawn to the emerging one. But... it seems to be going the way of all the others. Ugh. It's confusing.

At any rate, I stumbled across Mark Van Steenwyk's blog 'Jesus Manifesto' and he has an excellent post titled "7 Loving Challenges for Emergent." Very nicely put, and I am also guilty as charged. I wish we could all put down our damn weapons (words, mostly) and learn to love God and love others. That WOULD be a challenge. Anyway, thanks Mark!

Tuesday (random)

It's hard to concentrate while the ladies bible study is here. Not that I mind at all, but sometimes, you know, like if my door is closed... it might mean I'm trying to DO something. :)

Anyway... some random stuff:

• Jane signed up for school last night at Indiana Tech (in Huntington). She's shooting for a bachelors in Organizational Leadership or something like that. Although they say they can't tell her how much it's going to cost yet - and classes start Monday! I don't understand that part. Anyway, I hope it's not too much, because I think she will really like it.
  
• I have felt like crap since Friday night. My back is killing me. I don't know if it was all the riding, or if something has just sort of "settled" in my back area. It's nothing serious - this seems to happen every year about this time. I think it's allergy related maybe. My whole body kinda hurts, and my head feels like a melon. Not real pain, but just a nagging, constant discomfort. I'm tense all over. My back actually feels better now than it did Sunday morning. I was a little worried I wasn't going to be able to stand for the worship gathering. But moving around must have loosened it up some. Every now and then I get this feeling like I'm going to pass out though. Not that I'm going to, but it just feels like it.
• Today I have to get a haircut. Well, I don't 'have' to, but I am going to. I don't know why I hate getting haircuts. I don't like not having my glasses on. I can't see. And they trap you under that cape. Sometime I'd like to just take off running outside with the cape still on.
• I started reading Scot McKnight's "Jesus Creed" again. I've started this book a million times and just can't seem to stick with it. Usually I give up when that happens, but I WANT to read this book. I like it, I don't know why I can't stay with it though. I'm looking forward to hearing him speak in Findlay in January. He is from a town near where I'm originally from. I always remember the town because their schools name is the Pretzels - the Freeport Pretzels. I think they have a pretzel factory there. I wonder what their mascot is?
• I feel like I'm on drugs. I guess I am - allergy medication. Everything is slow motion. Man, my body aches. All over.
  
• A couple of weeks ago we sang "Kum-ba-yah" at our Sunday worship gathering. I had more people give positive comments about that than anything we've done in a long time. It actually was pretty cool. Sometimes things like that "click" and sometimes they don't. I think we may do it this week before communion. It's World Communion Sunday this Sunday, you know.
• I think Saturday night we're going to see Stephen Curtis Chapman. I haven't seen him in concert in a loooong time. I used to always like him. Seemed like a really good guy. In fact, when I decided to go to seminary - I wasn't really planning to be a pastor. I actually had visions of SCC or Rich Mullins or someone. I thought it would help me be a better songwriter. Funny thing is... I haven't written a single song since. Can you say "pipedream"? :)
• This is Tuesday. Just in case you wondered. But October has ALWAYS been a bad month for me. I don't know if it's seasonal allergies or what. But it's always been this way. 29 days to go.

peace.

Authority of the small

I started using Mike Yaconelli's devotional for youth called "devotion: a raw-truth journal on following jesus." Today he wrote:

Authority is a word that most young people don't use for one simple reason. It's a power word... and adults are the ones that generally have all the power. When adults want to describe reachable goals for you, they usually use words like maturity, growth, humility, or patience; but seldom, if ever, do they use authority. / But disciples of Jesus can have authority, whatever their age. This kind of authority is the result of simple living. The authority of living always has greater influence than the authority of talking. A young person can possess all of the benefits of authority -- influence, respect, and strength -- just by living an ordinary life and following Jesus wherever he leads. / Here's an easy way to know whether you have authority or not. If your friends ask for your advice, if they want to be with you when they are in a crisis, if they refer their friends to you, if they defend you to others... then you know that they see you as someone with authority.

It was interesting that I read that, and then opened my email and my "quote for the day" was: "A man may carry the whole scheme of Christian truth in his mind from boyhood to old age without the slightest effect upon his character and aims. It has had less influence than the multiplication table." (from J.G. Holland)

Then... my verse for the day was Matthew 10:42, "If you give even a cup of cold water to one of the least of my followers, you will surely be rewarded."

Also, last night I began reading Scot McKnight's 'Jesus Creed' again, and read the chapter on Mustard Seeds. You know, God didn't choose the biggest and the brightest, but rather chose to work in and through the least expected....

There seems to be a pattern developing here. Maybe the transformed life really is just putting one foot in front of the other. Merely 'not giving up' can be a powerful thing. I guess I have probably always been one of those people who questioned authority. I was never content with believing something just because someone said I should or shouldn't. But I guess authority isn't really what I was questioning. Not the one's with real authority anyway. I want to live an authoritative life - you know, to help people rather than hurt them, to do my part, to follow Jesus. And I want Him to be the one that knows about it - even if no one else does.

May God bless you with the patience you need to get through the day, and give you the strength and courage you need to live an authoritative life.

Poems by Andrea

I don't know who she is, where she's from, or anything about her, but I really, really like Andrea's poems. Here is:

silent moments

only in silence
do the tongueless speak
tears
rooms
windows
the wind

only in true silence
do the rocks cry out
and the bread whispers
break me

only the silence
can hear songs
hidden in the dust
and bear the laughter
of the awakening land

Mondays are getting harder (random)

I have nothing against Mondays as far as days go. But they are getting harder and harder for me to deal with. It's not even about going to work. There is no real "job" to go to. It's the coming down, and knowing that I need to do it all over again that sucks. Wondering if I'll make it to the next one. Knowing that in all probability it will be no different. The same thing over and over.

Someone has said that most pastors secretly resign every Monday. You lay in bed and wonder if you should even get up. Of course, most people who know those pastors probably secretly want to resign from church every Sunday.

I feel like I can say less and less on this blog. I feel like I can say less and less to the people in my church. The weight of responsibility is becoming unbearable. I get the sense I am not making sense; that no one even knows what I'm saying; that I am speaking a foreign language sometimes; and I don't really even know what I'm talking about. And I don't know what to do. There is no place in my particular tribe for people like me to go with questions like this or at times like this. There is no one to talk to. I know the people in my church don't want me talking about stuff like this to them. They just want stuff "from me." Which isn't their fault, it's just the way it is. So is the only alternative to just quit and live in the car? I mean, I couldn't get unemployment, I would have to move out of the church's house, I have no discernible skills that are of use in the real world. Ugh.

Don't worry, it's just another Monday. One foot in front of the other.

This past weekend (I mean: Friday) we went to Jane's mom's house. Her mom died a year ago next month. The house still looks like it did then. I don't know what we thought we were going to do. You know, Jane has 3 brothers that live right there, but she is expected to take care of everything from 300 miles away. Pisses me off.

We didn't accomplish a whole lot. We have some stuff stored there from when we first moved away. Most of it our kids' clothes and toys from when they were little; some of our wedding stuff. It was kind of difficult opening a box with Carrie's dolls and stuffed animals; a box that had all of Isaac's old "outfits" he used to dress up in (Batman, Robin Hood, etc.). Their teeny shoes and hats and coats. We brought some of it back with us. It was also weird being in the house. It's weird just going back to where we used to live, really. They say you can never go home again, but... I dunno. One morning as I walked Bogey down the street... it just seemed so.... right. I like the small town, our street on the edge of town, the trees, cornfields, people waving as they drive by. But then it's gone. It leaves me wondering if there even is a place called home. Not on Monday's there isn't.

This blog is going nowhere. This post is going nowhere. I am going nowhere.

There won't be any comments. I don't want to talk about it. It's just me. No offense, but I can't give you anything. I have nothing for you and even if I did, I don't know that I could give it because I'm pretty much running on empty. Tomorrow is Tuesday though. I hope it gets here fast. I dunno....