Manno, manno... sitting here looking at my daughter's wrecked car. That's the fourth wreck in four years. Bummer. But she wasn't hurt -- physically anyway. Her boyfriend (sort of boyfriend) just broke up with her last week - even though they never saw each other; she is getting ready to quit her job because it is far away and they won't give her enough hours (and she loves working at GAP); she has tons of homework at Huntington U.; and now she wrecked her car.
How many times to people get hurt without any physical signs? I think it's all around. The walking wounded. And how much do we even know aboutother people anyway? I know I don't know enough. For instance, there's a guy in my church who everyone thinks is just a total and complete grump. A jerk, even. But what many fail to realize is that when he was younger he had a 4-year-old daughter killed in a car that he was driving. He was still in the hospital when they had the funeral. I can't imagine what it's like to live with that. Adn I can't imagine the regrets or remorse he is living with. I wish I could help him find freedom; healing.
I went to a bar the other night and just sat and watched people. It's kinda sad to look at people who are trying to look so cool, when they hurt so bad. You can see it. Not on the exterior, but under the surface. And if someone comes along and wants to 'kick the tires' before test-driving... they just might fall apart. I think that's why so many people test-drive others without looking... just use people for what they are; don't get too close; don't ask questions. We don't want to know, but also... maybe we do know... and we know it hurts; and it's hard; and we're just doing the best we can. Makes me cry for some reason.
How is your heart. What would you pour out to somebody who really cared? What are you willing to pour into someone who needs a fix?
I'm reading McLaren's "Generous Orthodoxy." Today's chapter was on the seven Jesuses he knows. It was good, but I was surprised that I connect most to the Anabaptist and Eastern Orthodox Jesus. Strange. I am a pacifist. That just means I oppose war and some violence, because I can get mad as hell under the right circumstances. I hate people who hurt people. I hate it that so many people want to hurt themselves. I hate it when I hurt other people.
John Lennon. What an idealist. All you need is love. Jesus... what was he? What is he? Waht does he need? What do I need? What do you need? Hmm? What's on tap anyway...
2 comments:
I'm trying to decide if this is just too wierd (me reading through). I limit the amount of time I read/write bloggin' cause it's easy for it to become a time sucker. But I'm "stuck" here for now (which I don't recall happening before)...you know, it's a shame you haven't had a bigger readership. You have some interesting things to say.
Often I get frustrated b/c I have few readers and don't want to become an absolute blog or comment whore by doing the "things" that could help increase traffic. Mostly, it's an outlet, a stage for me to rant or play drama queen. BUT, when I have something deeper to say, I wish there was an ongoing dialogue, you know? The upside to that, is I don't have to go deep often, cause who's reading anyway?
What struck me here is your use of the phrase, "walking wounded"; it's one I began using in March when I went to a conference and saw soooo many hurting women. I realized all around me, people were in pain, and had been all my life, but I just didn't see it. Now, I see it, maybe in part, because of living through some junk of my own.
Gonna try to stop commenting for a while and just read.
I appreciate your comments, Robin. Feel free to as much as you like. And... nice toes. :)
peace.
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